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Halcyon Daze

Introducing: "SAINT PAUL"

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Very entertaining indeed, I recon if you can weave 'ST Paul' into the story somewhere you're a sure-bet for a prize. :) 

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3 billion years ago on the planet mars

 

Chapter (who knows now)

 

The Night of the Cactus Supermen

 

The garden was lit up with tiny green fairy lights that danced through the trees which blew in the occasional wind gusts , but they were mystical ones, localised, only there, in the garden. Just a few yards away, beyond the place, you’d swear it was a still night the whole night but right there, where they were, the odd gust was nearly strong enough to blow Noobies super-special just-the-right-one shamanic sombrero that he was soo proud of, right off his head, and made the green fairy lights jump around even more.

 There were dozens maybe hundreds of different kinds of magical plants and plant spirits to visit there and get to know. “One day…” thought Noobie, but tonight was Sanpablo Night. 

The Birthday Boys; Blackhawk and Goatboy loved sanpablos and always had some hanging around. Translated directly from Meh!heecaan the word sanpablo would literally translate to “St Paul”.

 Noobie hadn’t met the sanpablos in the flesh yet and was already amazed by what he had heard about them. The sanpablo’s were pretty small, an illustrious blue/green and covered in quills or even spines. Some said they were just a reworking of the oomph loompa or minions or even Mr Meseeks motifs or maybe even some kind of code. They only walked about a foot or so tall usually, but there were some huge ones here and there, rare old ones that really knew a thing or two. They were animate, common-language speaking beings of the cactus family. They were the plant spirits.

They carried with them a magical healing Elixir lovingly handmade from their special sacred sunlight juice that they shared with only the staunchest of people and it was a strong and holy brew indeed because allegedly it made those who drank it even staucher.

The sanpablos did the catering. They walked around the party randomly mingling or sometimes they floated around listening to peoples conversations or even joining in on conversations with the partygoers and they would serve people various different kinds of potions or a selection of the latest fairy dusts from the jungle or blah. and sometimes steer conversations in certain directions and each one had their own slant on things and how things should be done but they all knew everything, and everything about everything and, of course, the folks who were there meeting them for the first time like ol’ Noobsy were just mesmerised by the sanpablos, the Martian attendees walked and sometimes floated from one part of this magical space to the next, listening and talking about a whole bunch of fantastic new stuff. New to Noobs.

The little blue cactus creatures were showing people how to communicate with the whole rest of spacetime in new and exciting ways so that the people can figure out how to become part of the healing of everything.

Absolutely everything.

Themselves, each other, their hearts and minds and souls and the actual planet itself.heal heal heal. They spoke of how the sanpablos were a super species and there are many like them and they were teaching people how to become a super species too. Most of the fellas had known about it for years and were already fully fledged Cactus Supermen, they could fly, had True Sight years ago, regularly visited other parts of the cosmos, they knew all the plant spirits personally and what they could do and what they wanted to do.

And loads of magical things happening too. At one point Noob laid down in the garden and closed his eyes for a little while and when he opened them everyone was walking around 50 feet tall. There was one super man there who was soo magical that he’d made himself light as a feather and, while tooting on his magical steam whistle, he sneezed at just the right moment and flew clean across the room!  and everyone made sure he was ok  and the talking continued… and whats wrong with the culture they’re living in and whats the best ways to really fix it all and all about the Bull and on and on it went for days. an abundance of conversations about hundreds of topics.

The sanpablos taught them about Mars’s molten core becoming solid and that would lead to an unbreathable atmosphere where most of it is just swept away on the resultant coming solar windstorm event once the ionosphere is removed but that was years away.

There was much discussion about various sanpablo growing techniques to end up with crowds of them cute lil fellas floating around. at some point some of the little bluies started to get out of breathe but soon found lovely little patch under a Queen Vine and took turns filling them back up with a special secret gas and a little mouth to mouth and  aswwuuuump wheee or two of respiratory assistance and they were right as rain floating round for the rest of the night. Some said the gas was tasteless, others said they could taste something and there was some discussion around it's tastefulness. 

And when the Karaoke got started up, it was magnificent. The people who were singing actually hurt their voices, such was their passionate belting out of such tearjerkers. When they hit the high note of “Wind Beneath my Wings” one of the sanpedros just spontaneously exploded like a cactus wineglass shattering and the group of singers had to all be helped off the stage because they had strained their vocal cords so badly, it was an epic moment.

People at the garden party were just filled with emotion, song after song, and later, much later, some even began to cry with hugging required cos they just couldn’t handle it any more and the sanpablos snapped their fingers and the Karaoke was gone, disappeared into the night, like Magic, but the love and the healing that kept on going and it kept them all going and vibrating on whole new levels, both auditory and cosmologically for an implausibly long time. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by freakazoid
touch ups and jukebox
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After this "warm up" there needs to be new thread.......The Adventures of Noobie McSWIMmington .

As there are still tales of the Muskroooms and Choonga, And the Great Adventure to Mullupmoonby.

All this could give the Wizards cause to Summon Noobie to perform more deeds in different dimensions, in order to provide more tales ,Tall but True Fictitious Facts.  

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4 hours ago, Horus said:

After this "warm up" there needs to be new thread.......The Adventures of Noobie McSWIMmington .

As there are still tales of the Muskroooms and Choonga, And the Great Adventure to Mullupmoonby.

 

 

Totally agree, get our own SAB double dutch going.

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ho ho, yeah, like a dedicated SWIM thread. :):wink::wink: for everyone to play in. Members only?....oops i'm highjacking. 

but I noticed, when i kinda got into it :blush: the different levels of obfuscation required was a mind boggling maze of delightful horrors and utter bewildering amuzement. a good exercise, is what i'm trying to say.

 

Like a dance of the seven veils and i was dancing and wearing seven veils...at the start...at least....

 

the things we do for free cactus B)

Edited by freakazoid
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Just send him a cactus already!

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FreakyZ's getting one by now, no matter what. He's worked hard for it and his zeal for our common passion deserves to be matched with some awesome cactus goodness.

 

 

Shame on all you other noobs who couldn't be arsed with such awesome free cuts on offer.

 

What's the world coming to?

 

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Wow zowie, I'm just speechless but was just typing this 

 

Campfire story jukebox trade thread for people who like to swim

 

If you have some interesting stories or you have some spare entheogen.....

 

just like a jukebox, put in your plants and out come competitive stories....people could even read 'em out loud one day 'round the campfire, with instant interactive editing.:wink:

 

For those who have enough and have had enough

And also equally

 for those that don’t have enough and haven’t had enough

 

so now it's a one horse race with the Big H man in the lead on likes. but I wouldn't be so bold as to ask for a "to be continued" instead, i'll now go back to my shack and watch with the blinds closed and some fancy magical popcorn.

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1 hour ago, Halcyon Daze said:

 

Shame on all you other noobs who couldn't be arsed with such awesome free cuts on offer.

 

All right, all right:

 

Once there was a cat.

 

The End.

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I should strike you down for that. With one of my 3000-post lightning bolts...

 

Such insolence :slap:

 

Hey EG,  sin-bin this joker :P

 

Edited by Halcyon Daze
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17 hours ago, SayN said:

All right, all right:

 

Once there was a cat.

 

The End.

Is the Cat getting it on the Queen? What kind of a.....

 

WDSVR.gif

 

Details!

 

Edited by freakazoid

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Well there we have it folks,  a couple of clear winners I'm sure no-one will dispute. Congrats to Horace for his 'peoples choice' tale of a good ol' campfire get together, very entertaining. And no surprise for my personal fave, the totally awesome hard-earned 'thriller' The Psychedelic Adventures of Noobie Mc Swimmington.  Top effort both of you. PM me to collect your prizes of a beautiful St Paul cutting each. Please indicate which cut you'd prefer,

 Long and skinny or fat and shorter. They both weigh about the same.

 

Thanks to everyone who participated and helped me celebratebthe 3000 post milestone. This place has been truly amazing to me and I'm always happy to give a little back and spread a little bit of generosity . I hope it inspires to winners to do the same over the years to come.

 

Cheers everyone! :):):)

Edited by Halcyon Daze
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Gosh, shucks, the irony. setting a magical tale in a fictitious land because the actual healing is forbidden/illegal/scary to avoid any imperial entanglements. and then, winning a brand new "sanpablo" that looks just beautiful btw. and the tale was sharing a winners birthday, Noobie and Blackhawk regularly catch up, good mates ever since and on and on. The creativity juices required to win were given to Noobs by ..... and on and on. The plants win new custodians. with a tale to tell, built in already, to share. the sport of storytelling.  So Hal, thanks so much for your new clone/hybrid/named strain. did my best to make it legendary by adding all the lengendaryness to it that I had going at the time.. Gee wiz, just send 'em both to Horus. and maybe we'll do a prizes received selfie together as a wrap.

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Epic fucking competition and gorgeous new Peruvianus clone @Halcyon Daze
Congrats to;
@Horus and to @freakazoid

^ Very lucky boys.

I was meaning to write a short story of my Centrelink debauchery, public wig outs, claims of heavy drug dependency and playing the game hardout. I do it all for the cactus, for the spare time to cultivate. My job providers ceased all job searching requirements at the start of the year shortly before I was due to enter into a 'work for the dole phase' whilst still injecting me with maximum dole money each week ever since. I just had to lose my shit in the office and start screaming like a spastic, and everything worked out.    :innocent_n:

I turned blue (an understatement) during new years celebrations snorting U47 (aka U-47700), It killed Prince back 2016 (was amoungst the cocktail he was on) & nearly me too early Jan this year. I've now got a script for Naloxone that I have not, nor will ever need to use I don't imagine. I haven't dabbled in that class of 'comforters' since my blue lipped eye opener at the start of the year. Got 5 months of Mirtazapine 30mg untouched too (a medical record if you will, that plus the nax = good on paper if you're trying to get written off). Anyway after this 20+ months of serious grubbery (all for the cactus mainly - but I do hate work & bosses) Centrelink have put me in contact with a free government subsidized drug and alcohol Councillor (psychologist?). Muriel spent a fucking decade in Peru under the guidance of a shaman training in the practice of Huachuma ceremonies mainly, and aya to a lesser degree also. Retrained in late life (her mid 40's) in psychology, then went to peru for a decade, and is back now helping turds like myself at the job provider office.    

Anyway, I cant face her fuck-eyed (cooked/sizzled/whacked) any more, the guilt is overbearing, we share a genuine contact and froth together over garden photos. She wants to take me to Peru for medicine, she facilitates annual trips over there for interested/suffering punters looking for relief. She also sort of alludes to having facilities in Aus to provide the same thing, but definitely isn't 100% open with cenno referred 'loose-units' like myself...  Anyway, the rort, the game, the bludge, its all coming undone, but in a good way though. All roads/arrows/indicators are telling me that I need to experience the caccy, sooner rather than later. 
IT'S CALLING ME! - IT'S WHAT I NEED!

Shes met Darpan and Julian Palmer, has links to EGA on her website (Suchhh a fkn trip out & small world & awesomely cool). The universe is trying to tell me something here I am getting the feeling.
         ''I need Brew, and I need Peru''.       Heres her website: http://www.seekingselfhappiness.com.au/services-huachuma-consultancy.php
She probably even lurks on these forums. Trades as  'Huachuma Consultancy'  aka  'Seeking self Happiness'. Does anyone know her or have heard of her, maybe from past EGA's?

Anyways, I'm glad I held off, my story wouldn't of won anyway, but I'd rather not put my hand out for more  'hand outs'  these days, tax payers fund my free quality counselor's & pocket money. I'd rather pay if the possibility is open HD? I'm looking for 2 primo fattt  "St Paul"  tip cuts to start my collection if at all possible Hal? I will/can pay & pay handsomely (tis a gorgeous clone that I'd like to see many SABers start growing/propagating). Congrats on the once in a lifetime find mate & congrats again to the winners of this comp. Lucky lucky mongrels with awesome, funny, honest, clever and entertaining short tales. Has been a wicked thread.


Stay safe & love your life. Practiced harm minimization always.
... And don't be afraid to lose your shit publicly sometimes.
Everything in moderation - even intoxicated belligerence every now and then
   :wink:


Kindest regards to all the readers,
~Skellum (The Southern Grub)


EDIT:
This is her, younger, and knackered after a night on the aya I think a bit airy. But shes good (for me at least). Again, it was centrelink who put me onto her for free and is promoting these kinds of thoughts/beliefs for current drug addicts. Maybe the whole systems bout to shift boys 'n girls. Maybe the plant teachers will get the recognition, the law reform and the scientific study that is so duly needed (one day lets hope...):

 

Edited by Skellum
Adding vid
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^
Its been quickly brought to my attention that I maybe should not of posted her name & website etc for fear of her job being a government employee was the individuals concern.
She is in fact a private mental health contractor to my particular job agency (one of dozens available to choose from when u sign up for centrelink as a jobseeker). Her website is the face of her business, shes open and hands business cards out to every client and leaves them with the job agency. She only works for one, they love her, an employee of the agency recommended her as an onboard Councillor for this particular mob to have ondeck every Tuesday. Shes got a good contract, does good work, and is honest about what she does. She works in Aus most of the year and facilitates healing trips to Peru.

If any of my little ramble was not above board please scrub/edit it.  But I think its OK  -  Her job is not at risk,  if anything its like advertising  (in the right place, right circles)  for a mental health professional with her kind of perspective, probably what a lot of us need to be honest. Anyways scrub it if it needs scrubbing.

I'm ratshit & crashing out - its a heinous time of the morning.


Peace out & good vibes to all.
~Skel.

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8 hours ago, freakazoid said:

Gosh, shucks, the irony. setting a magical tale in a fictitious land because the actual healing is forbidden/illegal/scary to avoid any imperial entanglements. and then, winning a brand new "sanpablo" that looks just beautiful btw. 

 

 

It's rightfully yours mate, You deserve to carry the 'torch' so to speak. San Pablo/ Santa palo/ Sao Paulo needs YOU to make him great.  You did Good man, you did good...

 

 

Just send me your deets and it will come. Build it, and they will come...

 

 

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7 hours ago, Skellum said:


I was meaning to write a short story of my Centrelink debauchery, public wig outs, claims of heavy drug dependency and playing the game hardout. I do it all for the cactus, 
 

 

 

We ALL do it for the cactus :P Wait 'till you get them in the ground, you will need to take time off just to keep them pruned LOL. 

 

That is one epic tale Skellum, daringly truthful and introspective, a real contrast to the other tales -Great stuff!. I'll happily sell you (and anyone) a cut. I'm only charging 50c per cm, or HALF PRICE to SABsters. I just wanna get this one out there and kicking it with the best of 'em. Even for it's aesthetics alone, he's top notch and just dying to be bred with.

 

Wanna know a secret? I already crossed it with Terscheckii. My cuts all flowered a couple weeks after taking them and I managed to get my first terscheckii flower at the very same time. My tiny seeds have already sprouted and will hopefully sail through a mild winter. I hope to put some babies out in a year or so.

 

Cheers again Skellum, awesome, informative and terrifyingly real to most of us I'm sure :)

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8 hours ago, Halcyon Daze said:

I'm only charging 50c per cm, or HALF PRICE to SABsters. I just wanna get this one out there and kicking it with the best of 'em. Even for it's aesthetics alone, he's top notch and just dying to be bred with.

Thats all we're allowed to grow for these days, 'aesthetics' and your rare peru find (St Paul) is one of the loveliest looking Blue Peru's I've seen floating around. I will pay $1 per cm man,  set its value at a decent standard from the beginning, charge other SABers what you wish, from me I will pay $1 per cm (for your effort & I am particularly attracted to it). I will PM you later on tonight anyway regarding the caccy mate,  thank you!
 

8 hours ago, Halcyon Daze said:

That is one epic tale Skellum, daringly truthful and introspective, a real contrast to the other tales -Great stuff!.

Cheers again Skellum, awesome, informative and terrifyingly real to most of us I'm sure :)

Thank you for the kind words HD, means a lot. I'd rather write (speak) from the heart, I'm open with everyone about what I get up to. I get help when I need it and these days try to keep myself in-check somewhat and responsible with my indulgences along with straight up refusing to consume a certain class anymore (big for me)....  Things are good nowadays mate, the garden is thriving, relations are improving, meeting new people, etc etc...

Time for some mycology now its getting cold, woot woot.    :wink::shroomer:
 

8 hours ago, Halcyon Daze said:

We ALL do it for the cactus :P Wait 'till you get them in the ground, you will need to take time off just to keep them pruned LOL.

Mate, I'll upload some pix later on tonight. I've just gotten 24 immaculate pieces in-ground within the last 3ish months (last 8 went in a week ago). I'm frothing more than I've ever frothed before. Even more frothy than when I first discovered how clear the 'Internet History' as a wee young lad. Things are well and truly off their heads, when you see it you'll know I am not just decaying here like a leech on the system. I am doing epic things!


Cheers!
Expect some pix here in the next few hrs, and a PM from me later on tonight.


Lots 'o LOVEEE
~Skel

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Hey Halcyon,

Your beautiful prize has arrived and will be potted up with the best soil mix.

Thanks for the contest, and the out of pocket expense of postage.

Very communal minded stuff.

Cheers,

Horus. 

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Got mine today, cheers! Girthy bugger!

Slid it out the package and managed to get a spine right under my fucking fingernail. Went something like this...
 

 

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Sorry about that. The roll is meant to have the ends removed first, then slice through the sticky tape along the middle seam, then unroll the cardboard roll to reveal the beautiful sight within. Anyway, glad you got it safe and sound. Postage was a killer to your place LOL

 

I hope you have many wonderful years together and I do sincerely hope your finger heals soon :) 

Edited by Halcyon Daze

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Mine arrived too. I've only seen a photo, so far, but I swore when I saw it. No, not swore. swooned. It's got me all swoony. 

 

Thanks Hal           heaps

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Posted (edited)

Just an update to say my cut is very happy.

I will get him into the ground in a new major feature cactus garden at my farm in spring.

Thanks again, it certainly is growing into a beautiful head turner.

IMG_1488.thumb.JPG.2eb8e6cc23b5ac47db457cbe9aed6900.JPG

 

IMG_1489.thumb.JPG.5ca7b5bd5841592ec63b12b1325de84c.JPG

Edited by Horus

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She's a real beauty. Nice and blue. I do have a half a dozen or so left if anyone is super keen. It'll be the $1 per cm standard.

 

I keep fantasizing about crossing St. Paul with Psycho0 for ultra blue beauties on tap :drool2:

 

Cheers for the update Horus B)

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