Any Ideas for a nice Valentines Day Pressie?

[Ace]

Hello all,

I am quite hopeless when it comes to this time of year (and B'day and Chrissy) for my other half. A bit of background - been together for about 3 years, got a 6 month old son, living together for about 2.5 years, not married. I love her to bits , but I really have no spontaneous or clever ideas. I always have to ask what she would like, and it usually just a nice ring or bracelet etc. ATM, we are flat broke with Valentines Day well on its way. I have wanted to take her on a hot air balloon ride, but I think I'll save that idea for when I pop the big question. Does anyone have any nice romantic/fun/spontaneous ideas that would be appreciated by any women? Mine, in perticular? And no - she is not available - no matter how lousy a b/f I am

I usually find a nice poem and make my own card, organise a teddy and chocolates and all the usual nice guy stuff, but I need something to give her the wow factor without putting us in debt.

I understand this is a tall order, but any/all help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks all in advance

Ace

[apothecary]

I kind of feel bad for posting this because your request was so genuine, but couldn't help myself!

IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons

IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks

IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water

IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty

IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying

IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"

IronChef Foicite: but a potato!

IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man

IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack

IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol

IronChef Foicite: but there's more!

IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!

IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"

IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome

IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"

Good luck!

(I'm hardly the ladies man so have not much to suggest)

[faustus]

find out what she values a lot or is passionate about, that's purely indulgent... maybe it's a TV show, a band that she's really into... an author... then track down something related to it. it might be the box set of the show, a hard to find album, a second hand book autographed by an author.

buy alex gray's "kissing" and frame it (girls love that painting). or take her to see varekai by cirque du soleil, it's damn wicked...

or failing that you could always get her something practical, like a new kitchen apron.

[Ace]

Thanks for the replies so far guys Apo - haha! I will have to look into a potato or two eh

I think Twix was on the ball - I know that would seem like the obvious thing, but lately she has been really down and a bit mopy. Whenever I ask her what she wants to do, she negatively says nothing. When I ask her what she would do if she could do anything in the world, she still doesnt find anything that really stands out for her. I think she is still finding something that interests her. But thanks for the ideas - perhaps a nice CD or DVD might be an idea. I got her a couple CDs for christmas though, and it didnt really give the wow factor that I'm looking for

Oh, and yeah, I tried the 'preactical' present for chrissy 2005 - a spice rack, which she had said herself would be nice, ended up biting me on the arse with 'Is that all i'm good for? Cooking?' and similar remarks. So I've learnt that lesson lol

But thanks for the ideas guys and gals, and please keep them coming

[nil]

buy alex gray's "kissing" and frame it (girls love that painting)

<~ i don't.

i have no advice. i found the potatoes romantic and am not a jewellery girl and would probably give poorly advice on what a jewellery type girl might want. valentine's day is a capitalist sanctioned holiday created to boost the post-christmas economy by creating a misdirected need in society to prove love through expenditure.

i know! make her a pomato!!

[nil]

by the way, maybe if she says she really wants to do nothing she is totally freakin worn out from having a kid. kids are hard business. maybe she really wants to do nothing. it's kinda hard to find 'something that interests you' when you have a six month old. i've had relatively few 'personal interests' for the past four years i've been raising my son. especially if she's breastfeeding. that takes a lot out of a person. it's only been in the last two weeks i've started redeveloping my 'personal interests' to the extent i'd like to because being a mother usually comes first to good mothers.

what are you doing to help her in her day to day life? are you parenting half the time? is it her job? does she get any real time to 'develop' interests? do you look after bubs equally so she can rock off and do what she needs to do with herself, etc., or is she the homemaker primarily?

also, maybe she's got a bit of postpartum depression which is very, very common. maybe the most romantic thing you could do is participate in the family more, take the baby for walks in the stroller so she can have a bath with nobody in the house, etc., if you don't already do this sort of thing.

[Ace]

i have no advice. i found the potatoes romantic and am not a jewellery girl and would probably give poorly advice on what a jewellery type girl might want. valentine's day is a capitalist sanctioned holiday created to boost the post-christmas economy by creating a misdirected need in society to prove love through expenditure.

i know! make her a pomato!!

Bahahahaha!!! A Pomato! I like it!

I totally agree with you on that call:

valentine's day is a capitalist sanctioned holiday created to boost the post-christmas economy by creating a misdirected need in society to prove love through expenditure

Unfortunately, my missus would be very upset if she was the 'only' girl to not get a present on this completely american day of shopping for presents. So you can see my dilemma.

As much as I would love to say, no, why bother with such a crock, I need to be the good guy and make her happy. But believe you me, I'm not going to be a total prick year round - she get a couple days off - christmas, birthday, valentines day and now mothers day lol Perhaps a few days in between too (just kidding - i'm really a sappy hunk of pathetic love-mess) (wow - did that ever sound disgusting lol)

[nil]

i'm a really, really weird girl. i should never give girl advice.

[Ace]

by the way, maybe if she says she really wants to do nothing she is totally freakin worn out from having a kid. kids are hard business. maybe she really wants to do nothing. it's kinda hard to find 'something that interests you' when you have a six month old. i've had relatively few 'personal interests' for the past four years i've been raising my son. especially if she's breastfeeding. that takes a lot out of a person. it's only been in the last two weeks i've started redeveloping my 'personal interests' to the extent i'd like to because being a mother usually comes first to good mothers.

what are you doing to help her in her day to day life? are you parenting half the time? is it her job? does she get any real time to 'develop' interests? do you look after bubs equally so she can rock off and do what she needs to do with herself, etc., or is she the homemaker primarily?

also, maybe she's got a bit of postpartum depression which is very, very common. maybe the most romantic thing you could do is participate in the family more, take the baby for walks in the stroller so she can have a bath with nobody in the house, etc., if you don't already do this sort of thing.

Very good questions. I'd like to think that I pull my weight, but I think I could definately do more. I bring home the bacon and she does the motherly thing - this is the way she wanted it - not me. But even still, I'd estimate I do about 35-40% of the work, but I need to pick that up a good notch or two too.

Yeah, a lot of the time she is worn out, and I usually tend to pull my finger out most at this time. And I think this has a lot to do with the lack of personal interests. But she does have the occasional bit of depression, though this is something she has had for a long time now and I have always tried to help out with this.

And thanks for the idea of taking bub out for walks - this is actually something that we have just started to regularly do - its a great way to spend a little bit of time together, instead of just staring at the telly all the time. Plus its great to get some well needed exercise! But it could be a good idea to take him by myself.

- Thanks for your help Evo!

[apothecary]

That's a pretty good idea actually, instead of just one gift why don't you prep the house for a romantic evening (babysitter/grandparents probably required?) and then the day after take the baby on an outing so she has the house to herself?

[nil]

i think a lot of 'bacon bringers' don't realise that whilst they may work for $$$, they get to knock off and have a break. parenting is full time, 24/7/365 stuff. you can't 'forget about the job' as a mother like you can a bread-winner. it's stressful and tiring even if it is 'the way you want it'.

[sobriquet]

I have to agree with the bullshit nature of "St. Valentine's Day". I'd just ignore it and I mean what's going to happen long term if you fail to acknowledge the commercial sector's desire to sell all sorts of crap to you?

Divorce? Separation?

If that's how effing superficial a relationship or partner is then it's pretty dire.

Instead of dancing to the commercial calendar's tune of trying to artificially prompt you to buy something, agree to do something on a day that is more special to you both. It doesn't have to be about buying stuff either. Make something for each other instead perhaps.

Stop being a puppet to the puppeteers.

[Conan Troutman]

Buy a ribbon, tie into a pretty lil bow and place around your cock..

SUPRISE!

should go down well...

[incognito]

a professional theraputic massage always goes down well.

[penguin]

^^ i agree with jono, that sounds good.

[cisumevil]

Get the Grandparents to watch the young one for a few hours and take your girl out for a meal & have a bunch of beautiful flowers waiting on the car seat for her! If she's not Breastfeeding buy a nice bottle of wine and both relax and catch up with each other as we can easily loose touch with each other after kids!

I've been with my partner for 4 years now (not married) and have a 3 yr old girl & a 18 month old boy. I work but have always been very hands on as a father from the minute I cut both cords I was the first to hold our children, the first to change there dirty nappies, the first to bath their little bodies! My partner breast fed up until 12 months old with both but she would express milk so I could also feed the kids at all the awkward times! It's been hard with also working a 45+ hour week as I have had NO life of my own for 3 years now & average 5 hours of sleep a night but I know that will all change when they are off to school in a few years time. The payoff is that it is so rewarding to have such a great relationship with your kids as they are just big sponges at this stage in there life & god they can make me laugh!

Yeah I reckon a break for you both would be GREAT or even a picnic somewhere beautiful. Also if you dont work weekends maybe you could give her a Saturday or a Sunday off every week as a reward for raising your beautiful child! I know that after spending 14 hours everyday of the week with two kids under 3 is a very tough job & my partner loves her Sundays off as she can catch up with family & friends & talk to grown ups once again!

Good luck

[Ace]

Thanks everyone - I could see this thread getting torn to shit with smart arse comments (which I dont mind too much lol), but there has been some really good tips so far! I have got a couple ideas now, and I think I'll organise a nice make up call - flowers and brekky in bed with the whole family (well us and bub - nothing sus, just a nice morning ). From there, maybe go on a nice little pick-a-nick down on the lake amongst the weeping willows, then get my folks (if they dont have their own plans) to babysit and we can go out for a pleasant evening.

Or something along those lines I might organise a nice massage or something too - thats a great idea

Thanks everyone - anymore good tips would be appreciated.

[PD.]

IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons

IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks

IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water

IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty

IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying

IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"

IronChef Foicite: but a potato!

IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man

IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack

IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol

IronChef Foicite: but there's more!

IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!

IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"

IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome

IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"

LMFAO Apoth, thanks for that

I asked Nat what she thought, she turned to me with a serious look in her eyes and said "how bout ya try an engagement ring this year?"

That of course was directed at me, LOL, i shouldnt have opened my big mouth.

I think i will just get her a spud, so should the rest of you men with ladies. Cant beat a spud for love.

[botanika]

Ask her to marry you dude. If not, in my experience creativity doesnt mean jack. Nothing beats flowers and a card. Unfortunately the hallmark NWO (new womens order) has conditioned women to ignore reason, logic and male originality on valentines. Flowers are not original but they WORK! Do whatever u want but dont miss the rose ;)

[Ace]

Haha - cheers Botanica - but thats giving in to her too easily She has been awaiting the big question for a while now, but I dont think I'm ready just yet. But I guess that time will be coming up soon - I mean we have everything else lol

Damn hallmark! but they make some great poems which sound so good rewritten in your handwriting lol The chicks seem to love em ;)

[nil]

print this out and frame it and give it to your 'let's prove our love by legally enslaving ourselves to one another for life' women for valentine's day.

On Marriage and Love ~Emma Goldman <~link

 

In our present pygmy state love is indeed a stranger to most people. Misunderstood and shunned, it rarely takes root; or if it does, it soon withers and dies. Its delicate fiber can not endure the stress and strain of the daily grind. Its soul is too complex to adjust itself to the slimy woof of our social fabric. It weeps and moans and suffers with those who have need of it, yet lack the capacity to rise to love's summit.

Some day, some day men and women will rise, they will reach the mountain peak, they will meet big and strong and free, ready to receive, to partake, and to bask in the golden rays of love. What fancy, what imagination, what poetic genius can foresee even approximately the potentialities of such a force in the life of men and women. If the world is ever to give birth to true companionship and oneness, not marriage, but love will be the parent.

Edited February 7, 2007 by evolutionNth

[Avaricial]

romantic and suggestive at the same time!

[Ace]

Very nice link and poem there Evo - though I'm sure my partner will probably just ask me 'what the hell have you been smoking???' lol

[nil]

Very nice link and poem there Evo - though I'm sure my partner will probably just ask me 'what the hell have you been smoking???' lol

not a poem, just how people used to write in her day. ;) it's the last two paragraphs of that essay. go with the novelty indian penis cacti, those are a hoot. would look better with a bridgesii, though.

[Ace]

romantic and suggestive at the same time!

Man - they put me to shame!! I cant let her know there are bigger indians out there!! lol And she already complains about the cacti I have around the house/backyard But nice try anyway!