shroomy Posted March 31, 2003 step one: Remove lawn mower from shed step two: mow lawn step three:place lawn mower back in shed step four: this step cannot be substituted and must followed exactly- in order to manoeuvre mower into its correct location place left hand fingertips on exhaust and lift at the same time step five: remove hand quickly and shake and wave it around madly step six: run to tap and let cool water casscade over finger tips step seven: remove fingers from water, at this point excruciating pain should be felt around the finger tips. if this doesnt occur start again from step four step eight: have someone drive you to local hospital, at this point you should be swearing like a trooper and sweating profusley dont panic its all part of the deal. step nine: explain to ashen faced unconcerned hospital lacky of your predicadament and try to remember your details without losing it step ten: explain again to lovely sympathetic nurse the previous steps and continue waving hand around, at this point the swearing should be toned down a little step eleven: lay back on bed and roll up your sleave cause here comes the free stuff :D . the first two steps could be substituted for a wipper snipper or such but for the beginer i recommend following this guide for best results. ps: C. Darwin was a prick [ 30. March 2003, 19:49: Message edited by: shroomy ] Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waterdragon Posted March 31, 2003 see? that there is why i don't start the mower up. i think you're on the right track with the freebie dose but there has to be an easier way. also i think DL is in no danger of a freebie dose because of this style of injury. ha. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Darklight Posted March 31, 2003 erm... what's a mower? Shroomy ya big bimbo, what are you doing, typing with your nose? Or did they give you a take-away? Get better soon sweetie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Darklight Posted March 31, 2003 AND it'll stuff up yer test results at work for a bit.. I suggest you take full advantage Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gomaos Posted March 31, 2003 well...i don't have a mower either, so how could I do it? BTW does everybody know that lawns suck, are totally useless, boring, and mainly serve the purpose to show off to your neighbours how clean and tidy and well-adjusted to the mass you are? Look at me: My lawn grows so high that finally the neighbours come around and mow it for free...because everysingle available grass stalk on their lawn has been mowed over and over nd they are addicted to mowing...so I let them do it. Ever watch "King of the Hill"? A true texan in the fashion of G.W. Bush who is a total mowing addict. Once he mistakenly took a drag from a joint (and almost killed himself trying to vomit, as if that would get rid of smoked MJ)and his son punished him by prohibiting him to mow the lawn for one week. Man that was heavy on him... Strange that King of the Hill series: I totally despise most of the people in it because they're all squares and rednecks, and don't seem to know anything else, but I have to watch it, like, you'd be fascinated watching aliens BECAUSE they are so alien.... Auxin are the people in Washinton like that too? (I know many people here are) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Auxin Posted March 31, 2003 "Auxin are the people in Washinton like that too?" Addicted to mowing or watch crap just 'cause its so alien? Both are true. Of course where I live mowing your lawn is the law, you get fined if you dont (its not the country or state, just a freaky puritanical neighborhood contract you must sign in order to buy property.) But even where its legal to not mow people are still obsessed. There are exceptions though (I sort of know one gal, a texan, that when she finally mowed her lawn she found a pickup truck!) Free demerol: Have stomach pain that reccurs daily all your life, go to the hospital, they will want to SEE the stomach, they shoot you up with demerol (half the time) and shove a garden hose sized video-camera-biopsy tool down your throat. NO PAIN! And its so cool feeling the tugging on your stomach wall as they pull out little chunks of flesh I would have busted out laughing if I wasnt stuffed with garden hose! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
infinite_monkey Posted March 31, 2003 why is charles darwin a prick shroomy....? :confused: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shroomy Posted April 1, 2003 quote: why is charles darwin a prick shroomy....? I was being facetious, "bimbo EH" :D ooooh if wasnt disabled there would be a shalacking, but im fine, just 1st to second degree burns to my two middle fingers and first degree to my pinky and all on the left hand so this is the sound of one hand typing. and the only take aways they would give me were panadine forte :confused: I was hoping for ms contin but they wouldnt be in it . it was funny after the shot the nurse asked me if i was feeling woosy because of the morphine to wich i replyed "no i feel great can i have some more" but i think she thought i was joking. Gomaos the lawn mower could be substituted for anything realy hot i supose IE: stove top, car exhuast or if you were in a pinch a lighter or maybe you could borrow a hot cinder block from cs the important thing is to burn several layers of skin and be in real pain. Auxin hmmmmmmmmm iv decided to not to like demerol. [ 31. March 2003, 21:27: Message edited by: shroomy ] Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gomaos Posted April 1, 2003 Sorry Shroomy to disregard your pain and keep rambling abut lawns... I can very well imagine what it must be like...once or a couple of times I burnt my leg on a motor bike exhaust...bad enough but your's must be much worse... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Auxin Posted April 1, 2003 "Auxin hmmmmmmmmm iv decided to not to like demerol." Good idea. Its VERY easy to get hooked, even if you dont have chronic pain. And its just TOOOOO good, thats never a good thing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gomaos Posted April 1, 2003 watch crap just 'cause its so alien? actually it's not that simple... Ever since "Beavis and Butthead" I've been a Mike Judge Fan. Those lovable utterly stupid little punks were so anti-society and funny, you just had to like them. "Beavis and Butthead do america" is still one of my favourite movies. All entheogen-lovers should at least watch the part when they are tripping on peyote, great artwork and very "trippy". The movie has even got Hank Hill in it, with a slightly different name and an even uglier wife. Thanks to B&B he gets flooded, strip-and cavity-searched (by an old woman detective with rubber gloves)and what have you...he just gets what every redneck deserves...shit. If nothing else, Beavis and Butthead were at least funny and very well drawn. "King of the Hill" is the same excellent artwork, but what's happened to Mike Judge? Has he totally turned around and become and asshole or what? Is he himself a redneck texan at heart?Just making money? Puueii on you Mike Judge.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spiraleyes Posted April 3, 2003 i know how ya feel shroomy! my motor bike fell over a couple years back. i went to save it and grabbed the exhaust...sttssss!! as it fell further my fingers got jammed and much pressure was applied. sttsss....ssttssss!!! i quickly peeled my fingers off the pipe,but not all of them came off...ahhh the aroma!! as i watched my former finger tips bake away much throbbing....self medicated its now time for me to pass on my C.D. trophy :D Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Auxin Posted April 7, 2003 I didnt know if I should put this in a trip report thread, or a free dope thread- but here it goes... Free DMT: I found a cool DMT report, no gnomes or little birdies- this comes straight from a hospital, the one case where its legal to take DMT in the USA. I was reading a clinical research report proving that frequent DMT use did not cause tolerance and I came across something kinda cool. Heres the clinical description of the effects of intraveinous DMT fumarate: "Subjective Effects Clinical Interviews. 0.3 mg/kg IV DMT produced a typical spectrum of "psychedelic" effects. Effects developed before the saline flush was completed, peaked at 1-2 min, and were well resolved by 28 min. Residual intoxication at + 15 min was not sufficient to prevent any subject from completing the HRS, although many volunteers felt tired and "altered" before the third and fourth doses of DMT. DMT effects included the nearly instantaneous onset of a physical/somatic "rush," beginning in the head, which quickly led to a dissociated state. Volunteers "braced" for the effects of 0.4 mg/kg DMT, which all had received before, although only two had received 0.3 mg/kg in pilot work. Subsequent sessions were experienced with less anticipatory anxiety, although emotional responses to consecutive DMT sessions were similar. An abstract, geometric, rapidly moving, intensely colored, kaleidoscopic display of visual effects followed the "rush," and would often lead to perceiving of more representational images, such as people, "creatures," and complex scenes. Auditory effects were less common and were relatively indistinct sounds rather than spoken words. Transient anxiety accompanied the onset of effects, and changed to elation and euphoria in most subjects. The fear of losing control lessened throughout the morning, which is reflected in the "volition" score on the HRS, below. Cognition was relatively unimpaired, although most spoke of a heightening of evaluative processes, or "faster" and "clearer" thinking." -Biol. Psychiatry 1996; 39: 784-795 The volunteers were lucky bastards- they got days worth of pharmaceutical grade DMT hyperspace four times a day for free! That sure would make for an interesting extended weekend. Another study gave volunteers LSD FOUR TIMES A DAY for several days, and they say doctors dont know how to party! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tryptameanie Posted April 8, 2003 If you need an analgesic shroomy, try a cold water extraction of OTC panadeine tablets. Removing >99% of the paracetamol is as simple as dissolving in water, chilling , and decanting. This allows you to take as much codeine as you want ( dont take more than 500mg) without even a normal therapeutic dose of paracetamol. Check out poppies.org for more info. Codeine is very addictive of course, so be careful, but if it's just for a week of pain relief you dont need to worry. Get well soon. Tryptameanie. PS If you take a lot, have an antihistamine handy, as codeine can make you very itchy by releasing histamine from mast cells Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Darklight Posted April 8, 2003 quote: Originally posted by Tryptameanie: If you need an analgesic shroomy, try a cold water extraction of OTC panadeine tablets Don't think shroomy would do this, he doesn't live in a place where messing with prescription medications is legal Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tryptameanie Posted April 9, 2003 [ 09. April 2003, 13:47: Message edited by: Tryptameanie ] Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tryptameanie Posted April 9, 2003 Of course, I meant you should wait for the reform of drug law before grinding the tablets. Otherwise you'd be commiting a criminal offence! and no-one here would ever do something so immoral as breaking the fine laws of this country Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
