revenge of the kiwi

Hah! If only that was true

I was once violently attacked by a flock of these demonic kiwis depicted here; I was minding myself on a trail near Twizel on a beautiful summers day several years ago now, when out of nowhere, hundreds of these crazed, fiendish beasts came down upon me from the skies - all swooping, diving, and screeching like twisted banshees. It was terrible I say...and my poor dog Mr Ruffles, he never stood a chance; they went straight for the jugular, it was over for him in seconds...as he lay there dieing, in the clutches of death, they probed every inch of his limp wasted body with their devilish probosces, searching for the big blood worms inside. As for me, I made my escape, running back down the trail I had came, bludgeoning these vile creatures to their unholy deaths with my maglite as they latched onto my back and tried to probe my brains.

NEVER leave your pets unattended around such dangerous animals, and always be prepared when hiking in their territory; kiwispray is a minimum, and personally, I never venture into kiwi stalking-grounds without my trusty ol' AA12...but that's just me.

that's funny once I was once violently attacked by a flock of these demonic kiwis depicted here; I was minding myself on a trail near Twizel on a beautiful summers day several years ago now, when out of nowhere, hundreds of these crazed, fiendish beasts came down upon me from the skies - all swooping, diving, and screeching like twisted banshees. It was terrible I say...and my poor dog Mr Ruffles, he never stood a chance; they went straight for the jugular, it was over for him in seconds...as he lay there dieing, in the clutches of death, they probed every inch of his limp wasted body with their devilish probosces, searching for the big blood worms inside. As for me, I made my escape, running back down the trail I had came, bludgeoning these vile creatures to their unholy deaths with my maglite as they latched onto my back and tried to probe my brains.

AHAHAHAHAHA!! That has to be the funniest thing I've seen all day! Thanks for the laugh!