Tangata Manu

Holy shit I just typed an epic post but somehow lost it all. It was all about going cold turkey sober, and how its by far the most intense trip I've ever had. Fuck it. Mutant, you can just find out for yourself, if you dare. Two pieces of advice (which is really the only substance of the 2000 word essay I just deleted) 1.) Restrict your access to firearms 2.) Its not the drugs, you really do live in a world full of howling monkeys GL

"From wonder into wonder existence opens." - Lao Tzu I am an artist. My body is my brush. My mind forms my palette. Drawn breath becomes brush stroke, paint mixed by palette from colors of experience, committed upon canvas of cause and effect, under the light of now. Completed with my last breath, my masterpiece stands forever unchangeable in a reality created by its brushstrokes, its success measured by the artists it inspires, the possibilities it opens. My masterpiece contains many errors, few I have had the opportunity to repair, yet with age, my brush strokes improve, my palette expands, and the resolution of my regard deepens as I review my work under a light becoming more familiar. With this metaphor, I express my spiritual beliefs, ideas which cannot be contained in words but may be discovered with actions. I studied the scriptures and histories of Christianity, Islam, and Buddhism to form my beliefs, discovering in each a gateway to the same path, conveyed by the metaphors and actions of each religions' teachers recorded in each text. When I paint with conscious deliberation, I am practicing all three religions with every brush stroke. Religion has liberated me from the paradox of life, freed my mind from the question "why?" to regard my reality in every moment with greater resolution, and I can see a world in which religion is no more than a cultural descriptor, a world with only one spirituality and two types of people with regard to it: artists; and painters. Some art tips from the scriptures: Prophet Muhammad: "He is the best man whose life is long and whose actions are good."; "Learn to know thyself."; "Heaven lieth at the feet of mothers."; "To the light I have attained and in the light I live."; "Everyone is divinely furthered in accordance with his character"; "Religion is admonition, and it means being pure."; "Strive always to excel in virtue and truth." Buddha: "The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows."; "It is better to travel well than to arrive."; "Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without"; "What we think, we become"; "However many holy words you read, however many you speak, what good will they do you if you do not act upon them?" Jesus Christ: "Love one another."; "For what shall it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his soul?"; "My kingdom is not of this world."; "Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself." I'd like to finish this post with another quote from Lao Tzu which I feel is a superior expression of a point I was trying to make above: "The way that can be described is not the unchanging Way. The name that can be named is not the unchanging Name. Nameless, it is the origin of Heaven and Earth. When Named, it gives birth to all things. Under these two aspects, it is really the same; but in applying names we differentiate its manifestations. Of all mysteries, this is the most profound; it is the gate of all that is subtle and wonderful. You must rid yourself of desires in order to observe its secrets; if you have desires, you will only see its manifestations."

Would you like to meet God? He's inside you, standing behind the monkey.

Hehe.....I find listening to my thoughts to be quite constructive. If I listen long enough to hear my inner monologue dribble forth streams of random monkey logic I get a chance to contemplate one of the single most important truths in life: MY BRAIN WAS ORIGINALLY DESIGNED FOR A BIG HAIRLESS MONKEY. The only other way I get this catharsis sorted is in the aftermath of a huge mistake.

Tell me of Meditation, and I will tell you of Green.

My two cents: Everyone can meditate, we all do it dozens of times each day:

That feeling of orchestrated life....I think many of us have experienced this. For some of us, this feeling becomes a delusion which keeps us from perceiving opportunities. The delusion manifests in us when we do not understand the limits to our control and cannot rationalise our predicament, and is reinforced with both negative and positive outcomes by giving us something to blame or adore. When life is governed by the hand of fate, success seems beyond our control, so we allow opportunites to float past us, failing to strive for the ones which do not fall in our lap. We cannot know luck, and feel gratitude from fortune. We become twisted by the general frustration borne from our unsatisfied desires, every kind of beauty gradually disappears beneath the thick black meniscus of self-loathing, and we ask of everything, "Why?", seeking to understand Fate's reasons for having us be in such misery. Now there is a crossroad here (in fact, as a general rule in life, where you find yourself asking the general question of "why?" for everything as though you need some source of extrinsic motivation, you are probably at a crossroad). In this case there are two choices: 1. direct your rage inward (a.k.a. deny the rage exists), repress your desires 2. Direct your rage upon the world. One day I found myself watching a documentary on the herds of Africa. In one scene a large lion pack is harrassing a herd of buffalo and finally manage to isolate one calf from the pack. The buffalo herd retreats, stopping at a distance to observe the young calf's inevitible demise. The lions play with their young kill, torturing it with playful pounces, wounding it until it bleets in pain and despair. While the alpha bull angrily snorts and struts about in front of the distressed cows, one old tired looking bull breaks herd from his lowly outlying position in the herd and scatters the lions with a ferocious charge into the pack. The calf hastily rejoins the herd as the lion pack surrounds the old bull, slowly closing in on him whilst an incredulous narrator tries to rationalise the courage and selflessness displayed in the actions of this skinny old buffalo. As the lions cautiously draw closer to the old bull, the narrator reads his eulogy with tragic dramatic prose. He stands quite still as six hungry lions tighten their noose I am mesmerised by his calm dignity, as if he is quietly contemplating his bovine existence before death claims him. Even the narrator notes his relaxed demeanor as one of the lions feints a charge in an effort to engage the bull in some pre-mealtime play. He doesn't budge, which appears to rattle the lion pack as they seem to pause with indecision. I watch, morbidly fascinated, as the lions close in, crouching ready to pounce, the herd watches with visible distress, and the narrator executes his pessimistic monologue, the lions pounce almost as one. Everyone, except the old bull, is shocked by the ferocity of his defence. He repels a six lion attack, tossing the biggest one with his horns while stomping and seriously wounding one which came at him from behind. The lions re-group, shocked, but not yet ready to give up on their dinner, they maintain their circle around their formidable prey. They pounce again, and again the old bull fights back with noble savagery and wise tactics. Just as it appears he might possibly win, one of the lions is on his back, and all seems lost for a moment, until the stampeding herd enters the frame, scattering a confused and doubtful lion pack and leaving one expert narrator speechless at the second unprecedented bovine action. Sometimes shit happens, and inevitibly you will fail when you really need to win. Accept fear, embrace defeat, forgive yourself for failure, and you will learn from it. Every failure will make you wiser, stronger, and better. Inevitibly, you will find yourself surrounded by hostile intent. If you can accept your fear, it will not reduce you to violence, conformity, or self suppression. ON DESIRE: Cultivate it, don't be enslaved by it. Claim it, never take it. Earn it, appreciate its gift. HAPPINESS: We have no right to be happy in this life. We have every right to avoid unhappiness.

'Seekers' will always be lost. 'Believers' will never find truth.

In the past, I have encountered 'entities', only to discover they were the nightshift at Maccas