Illustro Posted June 1, 2013 Me'n my GF had a pretty up'n down relationship the last year or so...long story short, we had a 'summer love' a few summers ago now, and due to the different universities we study at, have been in a long distance relationship since. It's been tough, a massive roller coaster ride...tears, tantrums, semi-break ups, cheating (both of us); all the fun stuff...thought she was worth it, but I'm worn right down now, it simply pains me to keep this up. I've been more and more of an asshole to her, which I hate, but I just can't help but be so frustrated. Part of me really fucking loves her for some fundamental and rare qualities, another part has serious doubts about her, and another is completely tired of the drama of being long-distance. ...I think I finally turned her off, she sent a really sweet, but annoyingly naive email nearly two months ago, I took nearly a week to send her a short grumpy reply. Since then I've only heard a couple times from her (after me prompting her, and she usually emails me once a day), she was super positive and happy in her short replies...but almost too happy. She disabled her FB page around the same time also. ...So I assume we're off, she just doesn't want to say it. About 1/4 of me is kinda sad that it may be over, but the rest is totally ecstatic...feels like I've dropped such a massive burden! Never thought I'd be so sincerely happy over it; its strange, the feeling is almost spiritual, feels like a massive storm cloud that's been darkening my world for the last two years is gone. But, I don't wanna rock her boat any more, just wanna let our relationship fade away, let her move on gently; so that means I don't wanna email her and bluntly ask if we're over (or is that a really bad 'guy mistake?'). So, before I move on fully in my head, would y'all think that given the circumstances, we're unofficially broken up? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quarterflesh Posted June 1, 2013 your the only one who will know for sure. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
woof woof woof Posted June 2, 2013 ,.... another relationship issue,.... sometimes it's better to just end in your own mind. It's like as if you are afraid of the future, because that other person is the only constant (mental grip) you have,...... let go,.... and rediscover yourself in new ways. Be wild and free and don't let anything tie you down unless you really want it. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
indigo264nm Posted June 2, 2013 If the tears and tantrums were so frequent that they outweighed the good, stable and boring times then it can't be sustainable long term. Combine that with distance, then in my eyes you should definitely be 'ditchin that gash'.I've been with my partner for almost 7 years now and although we've had our ups and downs, we only really have big fights a couple times a year which is healthy in my eyes. I've seen too many friends involved in unstable relationships that is just constant drama and misery, and after having intense and emotional relationships personally in the past which were just draining I'm glad to be in a comparatively boring relationship. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Illustro Posted June 2, 2013 ,.... another relationship issue,.... sometimes it's better to just end in your own mind. It's like as if you are afraid of the future, because that other person is the only constant (mental grip) you have,...... let go,.... and rediscover yourself in new ways. Be wild and free and don't let anything tie you down unless you really want it. Yup, totally intend on that. Should be interesting having a free summer! If the tears and tantrums were so frequent that they outweighed the good, stable and boring times then it can't be sustainable long term. Combine that with distance, then in my eyes you should definitely be 'ditchin that gash'. I've been with my partner for almost 7 years now and although we've had our ups and downs, we only really have big fights a couple times a year which is healthy in my eyes. I've seen too many friends involved in unstable relationships that is just constant drama and misery, and after having intense and emotional relationships personally in the past which were just draining I'm glad to be in a comparatively boring relationship. The drama was mostly down to being long distance, she is actually ridiculously stable and low maintenance (almost 'self-maintaining'), one of the traits I love(d). The long distance bred the problems, long distance amplified the problems; it wasn't a reflection of her really. ....But fuck it, spent the day in a psilo somnolence, analysed everything, missed the shit outta her, but realised I had to let go; all I care about now is making sure she is hurt as little as possible by my next moves. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
