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The Corroboree
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Illustro

Think it's over?...

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Me'n my GF had a pretty up'n down relationship the last year or so...long story short, we had a 'summer love' a few summers ago now, and due to the different universities we study at, have been in a long distance relationship since. It's been tough, a massive roller coaster ride...tears, tantrums, semi-break ups, cheating (both of us); all the fun stuff...thought she was worth it, but I'm worn right down now, it simply pains me to keep this up. I've been more and more of an asshole to her, which I hate, but I just can't help but be so frustrated. Part of me really fucking loves her for some fundamental and rare qualities, another part has serious doubts about her, and another is completely tired of the drama of being long-distance. ...I think I finally turned her off, she sent a really sweet, but annoyingly naive email nearly two months ago, I took nearly a week to send her a short grumpy reply. Since then I've only heard a couple times from her (after me prompting her, and she usually emails me once a day), she was super positive and happy in her short replies...but almost too happy. She disabled her FB page around the same time also. ...So I assume we're off, she just doesn't want to say it. About 1/4 of me is kinda sad that it may be over, but the rest is totally ecstatic...feels like I've dropped such a massive burden! Never thought I'd be so sincerely happy over it; its strange, the feeling is almost spiritual, feels like a massive storm cloud that's been darkening my world for the last two years is gone. But, I don't wanna rock her boat any more, just wanna let our relationship fade away, let her move on gently; so that means I don't wanna email her and bluntly ask if we're over (or is that a really bad 'guy mistake?'). So, before I move on fully in my head, would y'all think that given the circumstances, we're unofficially broken up?

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It's over, if only because of the way you're describing the relationship.

Maybe it could work, but the emotion in your language makes me think that you've already reached the conclusion that it's done and dusted. Up to you whether you need closure - Me? I would be getting in touch to close things off neatly cos otherwise I'd be stewing on it for months. Others would rather just let it slide and deal with the loose ends.

Your call. Best of luck.

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