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is this joke funny?

  

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why do women wear makeup and perfume ?

because they are ugly and they smell.

not mine,i'll explain later.....

t s t .

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I don't think it's funny. Not because it's having a go at women, I couldn't care less. But for a joke to be funny it has to be clever. Witty. Unpredictable. And that joke is none of those.

Edited by Alice

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Bloody oath its funny ! I reckon people have become far to PC with life lately, I tell that joke and similar ones all the time, but it doesnt mean im sexist.

People have really got to relax with humour these days, because it is just that . "Humour"

Q. What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

A. Roberto.

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If the woman your having a dig at is particularly self conscious of her body odour and appearence i could see how the joke could be funny (at her expense) but still funny

the joke couldnt work unless you were insulting somone in the room :P

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nah I dont reckon its that clever, it's not even offensive enough. If one makes a joke that displays a nasty state of mind without going really far, it just seems nasty but if you push the borders a bit people will realise that that is not necessarily your pov.

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I found it funny because of the unexpectedness of the answer. "Why do women wear make-up and perfume?"... you expect some witty pun or something and instead you get a deadpan ordinary answer (which I don't agree with BTW) and that's what made it amusing.

I've heard infinitely more offensive jokes... I'm sure we all have. Plenty of them make derogatory comments about women or about race or religion. If we were to take them seriously we'd have few jokes left and many of them would be lame, although lame can be good. ie:

"What do you call a donkey with 3 legs?"

"A Wonky"

hmm... lame, but I dig it.

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That reminds me of...

What do you call a cow with 3 legs?

Lean beef!

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef!

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nah, it's just a crap joke IMO.

the only person I can imagine delivering such a joke would be an upset 5th grader / 10 or 11 year old??

Where did you pick this one up PH if you don't mind me asking?

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i find it particularley amusing to underhandedly have a go at women (when they deserve it) my best mates girlfriend is a real dog she often says nasty thing about me being a fagot (wich i am but shes an insecure overweight pog) i could never voice my opinion of her the way she does me without my mate getting upset so i drop the odd fat joke (usually hours or days after shes had her direct dig at me) and when we all go out for a meal i always leave food on my plate and make a remark about how there was so much food there i just couldnt finish it (always after she polishes hers off)

theres so many women ive come across id love to just smack in the face unfortunatly thats not socially acceptable for a man so i derive some pleasure from hearing nasty/derogitory jokes about women kind of like getting one back and if it upsets a female in the room that just adds to the comical value

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Not that funny ,but not like being told you gotta stay back till 9.30pm when you start at 7.00am

Iv heard it before , this truckie that used to pick up at this nursery i worked at , he also had this other joke that's sort of similar and offensive.

Q - " A girl on all fours ,with cum dribling out of both ears - what does that tell ya? "

A - " Floors level "

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it's not funny cause i've heard it before. it was funny, because i can dig ridiculously obvious humour. i don't think it's sexist as the crux of the humour is on the blunt obviousness of the answer. it could be offensive if said in particular context, but if someone were to be offended by such a silly joke perhaps then they have no-one to blame but themselves.

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sometimes it matters who says something. A sexist is likely to like it. A politically correct dud might hate it. I voted no, but it's a little funny.

Edited by mutant

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I love a good anti-joke. Something that is so unlike a joke it is funny.

A jew walks into a bar, his alcohol dependency is destroying his family.

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why do women wear makeup and perfume ?

because they are ugly and they smell.

not mine,i'll explain later.....

t s t .

 

Could be funny if worded a bit more clever, sounds like something a school kid would say, the way it's so direct and pulls no punches. It's a bit like those two line jokes that pop up a lot in certain situations...

eg; why do girls spread their legs when they are eating a pie...?

it keeps the flies away from the pie.

or what does the blind man say every morning when he walks past the fish market...?

"Morning girls"..

I like the blonde jokes a lot ...

eg; how do you know when there's a blonde chick working in an office...?

You see whiteout on the computer screens.

My all time favorite joke is...Man walks into a shoe store on his way to work and purchases a pair of shoes 2 sizes to small for his foot, puts them on and proceeds to walk in agony off to his job. The sales clerk is miffed why someone would do this and curiously notices him on a daily basis walking past the shoe store in excruciating pain to and from his place employment.

One day the sales clerk decides to confront him as he walks past the shoe store on his way home to quiz him why he would continue to wear shoes that are obviously too small and causing him severe discomfort.

"Excuse me sir but I noticed you bought those shoes from here recently, they appear to be 2 sizes too small for you and muct be causing you a lot of pain and discomfort.. "

The man replies.." yes they are indeed too small and certainly do hurt a great deal, but you know what, my wife left me for my best friend, my 21 year old son has informed me that he is gay, and wants to marry a man in his 60's. I recently logged on line and clicked on a link from my e-mail in box that took me too a porno site, whereby I suddenly saw a young woman who looked familiar having sex with 3 men in all sorts of provocative and demeaning positions, when she turned around and faced up towrads the camera I realised why the woman looked familiar...it was my daughter.

that's not all, you see I'm about to lose my home, I'm going bald, my car has been stolen, the new neighbors are young party type people who play hip hop music all night, the washing machine recently broke down, I haven't had sex for 4 years and it looks like my employer is going to cut 20 jobs and mine is one of them...so as you can see life sucks...but you know what, when I get home everyday after working my crumby job, you have no fucking idea how good it feels to take these bloody shoes off. :lol:

I actually thought Alice's joke was hilarious, it's gone now but that was pretty darn humorous.

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Not funny for me. Nothing to do with sexism, it's just dumb. Reminds me of another joke that others have found hilarious but I can't stand..

What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

etc.

Big lolz @ Mr G's one, though :lol:

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what smells funny...?

Clown poo.

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:lol: :lol: :lol:

both of those last ones I liked

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What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes??? NOTHING, you already told her TWICE.

:lol:

Also:

A woman went to the bar with a black eye." How'd ya get that?" asked the bartender." From my husband," she replied." But I thought he was out of town?" he asked." So did I!" she said.

Edited by Evil Genius

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rather than let the sexism continue i will explain.....

back about 10years ago my teenage daughters were viewers of 'home and away'.

there was this cool dude who was having a relation with melissa georges character.

he was going a bit odd and told this joke.....it was presented as symptomatic of his diagnosis as a schizophrenic!

have thought about this over the years and i still dont really know what i think.....

bet ya didnt see that coming!lol

t s t .

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^^^ Gee I'd hate to think what my taste in humour diagnoses myself as. I love oddball humour, especially when it's unexpected. "Funny" jokes aren't that funny when you can see the punchline coming from two blocks away, while stupid-funny like the original joke, and "what's brown and sticky? a stick!" which slays me every time I hear it because it's unexpected. Actually maybe that's why they "diagnose" schizophrenia for a joke like that. If a "normal" person is expecting to hear the obvious because they're normal-and-obvious-thinking-inclined, does that mean someone who isn't normal-and-obvious-thinking-inclined, isn't going to expect the obvious, thus they find it funny.

...

Or who cares humour is subjective?

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A woman says to her husband "What would you do if i won Tattslotto?" He replies " I would take 1/2 and leave you. She says "Well, I won $12.00, heres $6, now piss off"

Edited by Amazonian

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rather than let the sexism continue i will explain.....

back about 10years ago my teenage daughters were viewers of 'home and away'.

there was this cool dude who was having a relation with melissa georges character.

he was going a bit odd and told this joke.....it was presented as symptomatic of his diagnosis as a schizophrenic!

have thought about this over the years and i still dont really know what i think.....

bet ya didnt see that coming!lol

t s t .

 

LMFAO...err no I don't think anyone could have predicted that response Tst...damn you been harboring that thought for 10 or more years, that's some mad ROM engineering you got there man...

I bet that feels really good to finally get it out and talk about it huh...tongue.gif

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LMFAO...err no I don't think anyone could have predicted that response Tst...damn you been harboring that thought for 10 or more years, that's some mad ROM engineering you got there man...

I bet that feels really good to finally get it out and talk about it huh...tongue.gif

 

yeh,thanx all,i do feel i'm now comming to terms with it.....

t s t .

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I laughed...

An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from

the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all

over the road. A cop pulls him over. "So," says the cop to the driver,

where have you been?"

..."Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk.

"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink this evening."

"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.

"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his

arms across his chest, “that a few intersections back, your wife fell

out of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk.

"For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."

------

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer.

Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want."

The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources.

I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"

------------

A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution, bored out of their minds.

"How about having sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile.

"Lets have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist.

"Lets have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer.

"Lets have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophile.

"Lets have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac.

Silence took over... then everyone turned to the masochist and asked:

"So, what's it gonna be?"

To which he replies, "Meow!"

------------

A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled.

"We were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied.

The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were saying... See More the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde."

The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs. "Very good," said her embarrassed mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "No... it's because you're 25."

----------------

A man's wife came in wearing a sexy nighty. She told her husband "Tie me up & you can do what you want". So he tied her up, fucked her sister & went fishing.

----------------

A nerdy little accountant is sent to jail for embezzlement and they put him in a cell with a huge guy with a big bulge. The cellmate says, "I wanna have some sex. Are you gonna be the husband or the wife?"

The little guy says, "Well, if I have to be one or the other, I guess I'd rather be the husband."

The big guy says, "Okay. Now get over here and suck your wife's dick."

---------------

A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.

The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."

The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."

The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.

The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.

After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! "

The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"

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