Derkshaman

Thank you, it’s sold. Since it went for $55 USD/free shipping, I just donated $55 AUD to the forums. Hoping to chip in more down the line!

Donating half of final bid to this forum. Seeds were passed onto me a couple years ago obtained through the Spineless scop project. Wish I could ship to Australia but only domestic USA sales. https://rover.ebay.com/rover/0/0/0?mpre=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ebay.com%2Fulk%2Fitm%2F113152711260

This is exactly the logic I've realized. Taken the words out of my mouth. Which is why I felt the need, years later, to come and correct! i leave my posts on the previous page, to show the mentality. Even when writing it, you can see me try to back peddle after I realized that I had in the moment tried to propose that in certain situation, murder would be justified! Even then, I realized how silly it sounds even for a moment, to take an individuals life for possessions we have in our backyards. It honestly did bewilder me, to realize that back when making my last post, Funny, the other day I couldn't even kill a rat that had eaten chunks from a dozen of my favorite cacti. I refuse to use snap traps, you kill 10 lizards for a single rat... I use no kill traps and take 10 minutes to drive them away from my property. A friend of mine poked jest at me, and I was actually embarrassed to have a soft spot for these rodents (He said the no kill traps are used to drown the rat, only to release lizards)... I thought to myself, leave the sentiments- this rat is bad, but it doesn't care about me, it carries disease, it is bad for the environment- so forth. But I resolved by thinking, it really isn't a big tax to catch em and take em up the street. Or to better secure my gates. After all it's a hot desert. And maybe the rat gets a buzz from some of those plants. and these are rodents, lol

Reviving a dead topic. Perhaps a bit inappropriate. But I have clones of eileen now, willing to cut- I want to share to repay Sagi for his past generosity. If anybody lives (preferably non American or Aussie, since these plants are obtainable already) somewhere like Canada, or any country with relatively easy/affordable imports- Let me know and I will discuss sending a cut. Definitely would be glad to help a person or two, shipping on me. Besides- when I had this sent, I wasn't even aware of Sacred Succulents having a catalogue, including Eileen! The small piece of propogative material would have been better served to another collector in Europe or Canada. Also had a major awakening today with discussions in regards to weapons, security, property, life and material preservation. I'm almost bewildered my past disconnection and, perhaps idiocy in this matter. It truly doesn't reflect my perspectives or philosophies and reflects poorly on my current mental standings. The truth is, if this were another stating these perspectives- I would have held much judgment and felt very unsettled. So I am concerned as to not leave this impression on those and this community. Also, not to forgive my standings too much, nor to undermine my culture which is beautiful in many ways. But I am still very young and learning. I 'wake up' still very often. And the American culture- I grew up in the midwest USA, my family has based in Oklahoma, Oregon, Nebraska, and now we are mostly in Arizona. Lots of military affiliation and victim of the hardass, cowboy mentality and values. Thus, has been a sort of conflict for me to take the values from each that I appreciate, while leaving the flaws and shortcomings best I can. To represent which with integrity, rather than degeneracy... not to perpetuate bad stereotypes considering all of those who are poorly represented. Thank you all

BB Scop x Eileen.... WOW!

Is this clone making rounds here in the States then? Very impressive plant if I do say myself!

You sound like you're very well educated, conscious and aware on these matters. You're headed in the right direction. I relate to the whole doubt of ever being 'able' to live without any sort of chemical help... I won't lie, I do believe there are many people out there like that. Not that they aren't able to sustain abstinence, rather they continue an endless struggle just to enjoy life. But I emphasize the difference of 1 month and 1 year of a different lifestyle. A year of lameness might be worth it.

Taper slowly, it will save you from so much pain. Not everybody is capable of enduring a fast-paced taper! Especially with GABA-ergic drugs. I just say why bother? The Diazepam is a good idea. Very long half-life. My suggestion is do be prepared for some time where you may find it difficult to fine much satisfaction in things that you enjoy. But, I believe this won't be as severe as it would be with an aggressive taper. I don't even mention cold-turkey because of the obvious risks involved. I would also use the Diazepam as needed, perhaps rather than a strict routine especially towards the end of the taper. As in, wait until you are shaking in bed before taking the smallest amount that will relief such (along with a warm shower). I always emphasize that people must be functional to maintain their jobs and responsibilities, which is extremely difficult with an aggressive taper. Again, no taper feels good, but it if done slowly one is more likely to succeed and avoid relapse. One thing that I know is that the brain primes itself for addiction and tolerance. Say you develop an addiction to opiates... this typically will take a year or so for tolerance to get high enough for withdrawal symptom to manifest upon cessation. Then, the user endures these withdrawals and eventually is set free- they live sober for a year. Well, if that person decides to use again then tolerance will redevelop at a rapid rate... it's not unusual to reach previous tolerance levels (and subsequent withdrawals) within days or weeks! This should be considered. So five days is probably nothing, but I believe it's highly possible that you may endure withdrawals, especially with the magnitude of use. Please ignore most of my post if you don't experience much in the ways of heavy WD... I'm really tired and (I apologize for) skimming the post lead me to respond to how long the taper/withdrawal will last, rather than how long of use it will take for tolerance/addiction/withdrawl to set back in. Regardless, I feel some of it may hold worth. I wish you luck man. Addiction has surrounded me for quite sometime (family, friends... myself even though I'm still a teenager, having begun at age 12 before I could maturely asses my decisions)... it's quite a beast to be reckoned with. Nonetheless, it's one that you can beat if you are determined and equipped with the proper knowledge, awareness, and SUPPORT. And saving the sentimentalism for the end: imagine yourself as a sailor... even when the waters mellow, you must be prepared to fight and navigate through he storms. Then even once you are past this intense discomfort... some degree of this tends to linger, but I don't say this to discourage you! I believe the remedy is just 'finding yourself' once again. Any addict MUST build a new character, learn healthy coping mechanism, and accept that life is, for many of us, just as much of a bitch as it is beautiful. I see one addiction replaced with another so often, a lot of the time in the wrong direction too. It takes a very long time to get to a baseline that is good (rather than just tolerable), but after you get through the bad it only gets better, and at the 1-year mark its hard to imagine how great a sober life can feel. Don't ignore little things like aerobic exercise, green tea, and generally healthy eating like Broccoli :). The rewards are cumulatively huge. Low dose Ashwaghanda is helpful for many including myself, but higher doses seem to aggravate apathy/blunting oddly enough in my somewhat limited experience.

I've used substances like selegine, prescribed by a psychiatrist for DA related dysfunction... apathy & attention related issues predominately. Selegiline is a selective MAO-B inhibitor, which as you've likely researched only metabolizes DA, and the drug rarely will cause implications mixing with other drugs or tyrosine containing foods. I experienced very substantial 'blunting' effect in my personality, emotion, and humor... along with insomnia. I would feel wired, in the way that I still wanted to just lay and rest my eyes with my shoes still on. The main problem with MAOI is that they just seriously jack up your sleep architecture, and this will carry on to so much more of your physiology. They sound good on paper (until looking at sleep architecture), but in my experience it was not helpful. I don't want to hurt your hope. Just my two cents. This is probably going to make people hate me. But I've read much studies on orgasm having overwhelming blunting effects on DA transmission that lasts 2-4 weeks. For me, abstinence was more beneficial than anything else. That and I quit smoking weed (but I felt even more dysfunctional for at least two weeks before I eventually noticed strong benefit).To those that have no issues, please continue your ways as it's not a problem for most people. I am just explaining for myself. All drugs that affect DA transmission will have some degree of cross-tolerance, as well, so consider that.

#29 Am I doing this right? Woohoo

In response to Trucha... Yes I think that the reason that a person uses the drug is often dismissed, and that here in the US we tend to see drug use as nothing but a bad habit, that when given up or fixed, yields nothing but positives. There is a reason for this though: there are obvious negative impacts for using drugs that would make even an open minded person feel urgency to get clean. I don't think it's always a matter of society telling you something is definitely bad, and subsequently causing guilt... A person who is addicted to drugs will often (usually, with some habits) notice horrible, detrimental impacts whether or not society defines this. Many people could care less about what society thinks about drug use... I mean, that's part of the reason why a person decides to self-medicate in the first place (they decide on this themselves, despite conflict from society). These same people end up feeling urgency to quit, and it is because the negative impacts they notice, rather than just beginning to feel guilty from society's judgement. For example, the most obvious in this situation... 1g tianeptine a day would be very expensive... that's money that the person could be using to improve their life, perhaps even enough to be the matter of progress vs stagnancy. They could be failing to invest this money in more long-term happiness. Next, they are less consistent... being on a mental teeter-totter, as mind altering drugs enter then leave their system... it's very hard to be consistent, and the person has a harder time understanding who they really are or what they want in life with all of this going on. Anyways, I don't think this is to debate whether or not drug addiction is wrong. Yes, there is obviously physical, structural tendencies for drug use that society seems to often fail to address. This is just helpful advice for somebody who has already decided on what they want- to get clean and become freed from their dependency. ADDED: The short-term goal is to become free from this addiction. Then it is to find a better and more lasting set of solutions to address the problems that originally led to this addiction. The second part is more complicated, indeed. It may involve lifestyle changes, but depending on your standpoint, it likely will involve other medications, drugs, or herbs. I am not capable of giving much advice more specific than this. But when somebody opens up another world of troubles through addictions, that person often just wants to get back to where they were, even if suffering to begin with, before trying another route.

My apologies; I didn't completely weigh your statements. In that case, using naltrexone would probably be manageable, but it will do little as far as reducing cravings, perhaps even making the symptoms worse. I would predict that it will also make post-acute withdrawals more severe, yes. Although it should, as you know, prevent impulsive relapse due to its blocking/dampening effect on the opiate response. It would speed the recovery as well. So considering this, I don't have strong opinion on whether or not it should be used. Everyone is different. I am one to advocate tapering, depending on the person. Like a tapering period as long as a month until complete abstinence. The suffering is at least not as intense, and is more manageable... although it's more enduring. For most people they have no choice but to continue working, balancing family, school, or etc... and you have to be realistic in how you will be able to function and manage these things; life cannot always stop and wait for someone to recover. But for many others, tapering is hardly effective, and cold-turkey w/ naltrexone will be the way to go. I can't dismiss either routes efficiency.

Naltrexone is going to make the WD severe! I would never consider that for somebody unless they have time free from work, childcare, etc... I can't see them being able, or willing to function hardly at all going from a large tianeptine habit and almost immediately to precipitated withdrawals. In the case of opiates, I am a firm believer that suffering/unpleasantness directly correlates with healing. Just as you will feel euphoria, relaxation, etc as neurotransmission in whatever parts of the brain adapting (downregulating in this case), you will feel dysphoria, unpleasantness, and anxiety as that system is working to recallibrate (upregulate). But, you still must consider the likelihood for relapse... although in theory cold-turkey is the fastest road to recovery, many (most?) people become more likely to relapse than with tapering. I have also heard tapering to be ineffective for some though, as addicts tend to rationalize using more, and make very slow or no progress. I would recommend tapering with just the tianeptine- recognize the withdrawal symptoms, and appreciate them as a measure of healing, and keep the end goal in mind. They will likely not find something that will substantially help them in the withdrawal. It will be unpleasant- as I just mentioned, to heal they must feel the withdrawal. Any drugs that substantially improve symptoms will likely be drugs with similar mechanisms of action. For example, kratom will ease withdrawal symptoms, but only because it stimulates the same types of neurotransmission that needs to recalibrate. With that in mind, such a drug will slow this recallibration (healing). This is why I suggest tianeptine simply being tapered down, rather than worrying about other supplements/drugs to help. Sure, drink your tea, take mellatonin, smoke some herb (if he's into that), and Valium for the worst of nights... this will probably increase his odds of making it through the acute WD. But I must emphasize that unfortunately nothing will do away with the suffering that one has to endure in order to heal. You may have heard that 'addiction' is permanent. After your brain has primed itself for addiction (tolerance), that person will tend to rapidly regain this tolerance when re-continuing use of that substance, at a rate much, much faster than when before they had first developed tolerance. This is more relevant to opiates than any other addictive drug in my experience. For example, in the case for somebody who developed a tolerance for an opiate, who quits the habit entirely for upwards to a year, and subsequently gets past all the withdrawal symptom and tolerance goes back down... if they use opiates over just one weekend, come Monday they will be back in withdrawal with most of their tolerance returned. I mention this in response to that person's motive to eventually use the medication again, effectively, at more reasonable dosages. It may not be realistic. Lastly, he shouldn't ever give up. The acute withdrawal is only about a week long. After that it's just a matter of staying determined, and finding other, healthier vices in life. And even if he fails once, or a hundred times, there is still opportunity to change that and get clean. I've seen this first hand. EDIT: Might throw this in here too. Everybody will appreciate something that's easy to control, like taking another supplement, to ease and improve the situation, and I understand that completely. There is an herb called Ashwaghanda, an adaptogen, that I use myself. In the US, encapsulated extracts are very cheap and available. It has a broad range of benefits that have been measured in studies- not only has it been shown to (greatly) improve sleep, reduce anxiety, reduce scores of depression, and etc- it also has been shown not only in vitro, but in vivo on human patients, to induce neurosurgeons- repair damaged synapses and increase dendritic branching- it basically appears to make the brain more plastic. In addition to this, it has odd effects with opiates... studies have shown it to prevent morphine tolerance from developing with co-administered; it also seems to block general effects, and increase rate of tolerance reduction when discontinuing opaites. It would appear to be greatly beneficial when recovering from an addiction to opiates.

Lately I've had some issues with plants being seized and destroyed for lacking phytosanitary certificate. It appears that obtaining the certificate is tedious and or expensive, because nobody seems to include one- instead they just accept the risk of seizure. I've tried looking up information on how to obtain these certificates- the costs, etc but it's very difficult to find straightforward information on the matter, but maybe I'm just an idiot.

BBB Bridgesii is going to be referring to Bouncing Bear Botanical's (Bridgesii), in this case most definitely.