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Nothing is fun anymore :(

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Ive never personally found any of the herbal depression cures to be much help at all. And most of the pharms are just a ticket into temporary relief, addiction and further loss of balance in the brain chemistry.

Im also too disorganized to stick with meditation, but Ill give it another go soon, hopefully starting today.

Psilocybin, 100 mg of powdered cubensis or equivalent daily, can really work wonders. Not a big fan of tripping, but I love its medicinal potential.

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you may just be meant to be playing much bigger games BT.

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Thats also true. Since Ive finaly realized what my path in life should be, and have taken immediat action on the first step, my severe 15 year long depression seems to have simply dissapeared!

Never give up trying to find what makes you happy and fullfilled! Be sure you ll eventually succed, because then you surely will.

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In the shamanic view, mental illness signals “the birth of a healer,” explains Malidoma Patrice Somé. Thus, mental disorders are spiritual emergencies, spiritual crises, and need to be regarded as such to aid the healer in being born. What those in the West view as mental illness, the Dagara people regard as “good news from the other world.” The person going through the crisis has been chosen as a medium for a message to the community that needs to be communicated from the spirit realm. “Mental disorder, behavioral disorder of all kinds, signal the fact that two obviously incompatible energies have merged into the same field,” says Dr. Somé. These disturbances result when the person does not get assistance in dealing with the presence of the energy from the spirit realm.

http://earthweareone.com/what-a-shaman-sees-in-a-mental-hospital/

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Btw it helps to be a little more specific with your location ie hot/warm?

Are you in qld? If so GABA (Gamma Aminobutric acid) is legal and csn be bought from health shopd... might be cheeper than guxling down on expencive bannanas.

If your not far perhsps someone may be able to msil you some.

Its pretty natural shit so you wont get introuble or anything trying to obtain it.

Just some total dickheads made it illegal elsewhere in oz.

Yes i know why but lets leave that out of this thread thanks.

Wert

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Meditation may frustrate you at first because you will most likely fail.

But it is a journey worth taking. In the end you may find what youve been looking for.

Hey you might even end up getting samadhi your first try? Id say check it out. It helped me greatly . And i was suicidally depressed since i was young.

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Also becoming reliant on any substance isnt really a good thing. Being realiant on nothing is better. You may think "well youre reliant on meditation if you meditate though?"

But all i can say to that is that meditation goes beyond meditation.

I hope you find your inner peace dude

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In the shamanic view, mental illness signals “the birth of a healer,” explains Malidoma Patrice Somé. Thus, mental disorders are spiritual emergencies, spiritual crises, and need to be regarded as such to aid the healer in being born. What those in the West view as mental illness, the Dagara people regard as “good news from the other world.” The person going through the crisis has been chosen as a medium for a message to the community that needs to be communicated from the spirit realm. “Mental disorder, behavioral disorder of all kinds, signal the fact that two obviously incompatible energies have merged into the same field,” says Dr. Somé. These disturbances result when the person does not get assistance in dealing with the presence of the energy from the spirit realm.

http://earthweareone.com/what-a-shaman-sees-in-a-mental-hospital/

Funny you should say that. My old lady went to a psychic recently (i dismiss psychic's as a bunch of boloney though) and the first thing the psychic said to her was "your son is destine to be a powerful healer. He is destine for something big" without knowing she had a son.

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On the path to becoming a healer.. You are your first patient.

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meditation just seems, well, silly to me. Maybe i need to change my attitude? All this talk of energies and the likes just makes me cringe. I doubt i will ever change my attitude towards it but am willing to try anything

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Meditation isn't really about energies and other mystical mumbo jumbo dude. Put simply its being aware of the constant commentary (thoughts) everyone experiences in their head, and learning that they are transient in nature and thus have no real truth. Meditation helps you to observe these thoughts, and over time, be more aware of them (mindful) and limit their impact on your life. Its not even really "spiritual" its just eastern psychology.

The best meditation advice I've heard is -

1 - 5 good minutes of stillness is worth far more than 30 minutes of forced, unsettled stillness ( in reference to almost all beginners who think they need to sit for at least 20-30 minutes right from their first time)

And

2 - Just keep at it ( everything that is worthwhile takes time an practice, something people find hard to accept in our modern fast paced world full of quick fixes and " miracle" pills.

Just think, its free, requires nothing but yourself, and the worst thing that can happen is you sit on ya arse for a few minutes an chill.

Also, it doesn't have to be just sitting. Walking, standing and lying down are just as valid forms of meditation.

Anyway, this is just to dispel any airy fairy mystical ideas you may have. You gotta find what's right for you, but I'm sure you don't need me to tell ya that :)

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so meditation is just another word for relaxing?

In the simplest of descriptions, yes. Or more like a form of relaxation.

When you go to a psychologist and pay hundreds of dollars to be taught simple relaxation methods, they are basically selling you a dumbed down version of 2500+ years of the eastern sciences of the mind. Something that everyone can do and learn easily for free.

EDIT - If you decide you'd like to give it a shot BT then flick us a PM an I'll find something to get u started.

Edited by Cubism
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meditation is watching

watching the mundane

if you watch a thought or sensation rise.....like hearing a dog bark..."dog barks"...it then becomes a stream of thought.....

dog barks...you may then recall your pet dog....then onto some associated fantasy....etc

so one thought gives birth to the next and so on...

this is our nature....our mind...our being....we are constantly on this stream.....(though your probably in the rapids, or maybe just going round & around in some dark pool........)

so meditation is simply just watching or cognizing each moment, but rather than allowing that moment to lead you into the next, like a day dream...a stream....

You let it go.....& so are no longer driven ....but become your own master...

then you cognize the next moment and let that go...& so on.

sounds incredibly boring huh?

& it can be/is, all your doing is watching the mundane.....but that mundane is reality...& we run & hide from it constantly.........just give me any kind of distraction.....Please!.......which is why we are all completely mad...all 8 billion of us...

a good analogy is like we are all obese and insight meditation is like serious fasting, that's why I suggest the 10 day stint.

You don't go there to have a trip...........but for most first timers it is a trip............but it is hard...although as your with a whole bunch of other people in silence...with a teacher/assistant ...its structured...everything is taken care of, all you have to do.. is sit.

So your fasting/staving your mind...your mind is desperate for distraction...anything but mundane reality ...you may recall memoires you haven't had for a very long time ..as you mind digs deeper and deeper ...disparately trying to feed its craving ...its desire ...it will probably be physically painful or & an emotional upheaval......

the more you are able to focus and keep coming back to observing the moment...the more powerful/profound the experience will be..............or you could just cave into desire and spend 10 days having very vivid fantasies....small steps or big steps, your the driver...........

if nothing else obviously we all/have been and will be where you are now..........its not easy...

Edited by Dreamwalker
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Yeah i tried telling the GP this. She pretty much laughed at me

seriously? i would of walked out lol. i would definitely try move from zoloft to meditation/healthy diet/exercise

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You can develop tolerance to ssri's and sometimes they can cause a worsening of your symptoms. They are not meant to make you happy or bring your mood up just keep you from bottoming out. If you are not suicidal I do not believe they are necessary. But I am no doctor so do not give my opinion any credence. The psychological field has made its mark making mountains out of mole hills.

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In my experience if you have been smoking heavily for some time then its going to take a while for things to balance back out once you stop.

You say its been a few months and I know that feels like its quite a while and I know it can be frustrating but I personally didnt feel a real shift in my happiness, contentment and clarity of thought for about 12 months after quitting smoking.

Remember that it takes up to 3 months to get out of your system too, for example the last time I quite I had regular urine tests and it took around 15 weeks to come up clean.

Something else to keep in mind is that it may be caused at least in part by something else and you haven't noticed it as much because you've been smoking.

Like the Zoloft for example.

For me personally I found amino acid and vitamin supplements extremely helpful during recovery periods, IM vitamins are really good.
Your brain, endocrine system and organs are repairing them selfs and can use some help.

Anyway, give it time mate, it could take a year or two before you feel major changes and more like your 'old self'

Edited by AndyAmine.
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These singing bowls (mindfulness bowls) are great for meditation/ relaxation. I gong mine daily :P

hangmasszazs_1.jpg

Edited by Halcyon Daze

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When one seems to lose the color in their life one should close their eyes and begin to understand the darkness for it is only when one appreciates the darkness that one can understand true beauty.

I too had this issue at one point. I had panic attacks while my body tried to normalize after a massive burn out working 2 jobs full time nights with another job 2-3 days of the week. Everything did normalize and the only thing I needed was melatonin and another sleep medication for a week then I took it as needed for about 1-2 months never even finished the bottle. Then I stopped needing it and felt better. Antidepressants should be used as tools by medical professionals. I feel that only in very select cases should this be seen as a long term option. Sometimes the thing we fail to consider is taking on new challenges such as trying to find a new job, beginning to exercise, cooking, or even something as simple as taking care of plants. These small things can make a world of difference.

I hope you feel better and please take the time to consider the small miracles which occur every day and the beauty that surrounds us in nature.

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I found the same thing after cleaning up from many substances at various points in my life. For me the thought of not being able to do things I enjoyed again made me feel as if the future held nothing to get excited about. I thought about all the times which I believed my enjoyment of things would be compromised in the future.

This might not help for your situation but I realized once I broke regular habits and routines I could still enjoy substances in a more planned manner. I find a point where I feel the need to get on something. Sometimes after 2-6 months. I do what I want and get a huge release, I feel satisfied and happy.

After knowing I have enjoyed myself and from that point on my enjoyment will decrease and negative impact on my life will increase I stop again. I find the desire to clean up again returns for me and I am exited to approach the next few months of clean living. I find I know when I need to change my cycle. For me I feel there can also be a negative impact from abstaining for too long. For me it can cause me to be unhappy without paying it the attention I should. I find mixing it up makes me exited to live clean and then exited to indulge!

So for me hard weight training, striking heavy bag, running, eating and living clean, for my clean months. Then dancing, enjoying trippy music and movies, drinking smoking and other various substances for a day or two before starting over.

Gl, hope you feel better how ever you approach it, It is a new time in your life so its going to take some experimenting with things till you get it just the way you want it. Don't be afraid to fail when searching for ways to find joy again.

Edited by rigger
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Eckhart tolles book "a new earth" pulled me out of a suicidal depression.

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I have known for a while dehydration aids feelings of anxiety so i did a quick search on depression and dehydration , you say you dont drink water maybe you should give it a go.

Depression and dehydration are linked for several key reasons, especially in relation to the production and metabolism of serotonin, tryptophan and essential amino acids in the body and brain.

There are many different types of depression, which can range from feelings of mild depression to more severe clinical depression.

So it would be too simplistic to say that all forms of depression are affected by dehydration.

However, when we understand that the brain tissue is about 85 percent water and the body is about 70 percent water, it is only logical to conclude that not drinking enough water will have a significant impact not only on the physical body, but also on the mind and the emotions.

In addition, a significant number of Americans are suffering chronic dehydration and are unaware of its effects on the mind and the body.

Depression is a common symptom of chronic dehydration.

Dehydration Affects Serotonin Production

There are many reasons why depression and dehydration are linked. One of the most significant reasons is that depression is often connected to insufficient levels of serotonin, an important neurotransmitter.

An essential amino acid, tryptophan, is converted to serotonin in the brain. However, when the body is dehydrated, the transport of tryptophan across the blood-brain barrier is deterred.

Dehydration also causes a shortage of tryptophan in the body because of the body’s impaired ability to detoxify when there is a water shortage.

Thus, the liver then uses more tryptophan as an antioxidant to help neutralize free radicals and other toxins in the body.

In addition to dehydration’s effect on tryptophan, it can also deplete other essential amino acids in the body. Studies have shown that an incessant shortage of amino acids can contribute to feelings of dejection and inadequacy, as well as feelings of anxiety and irritability.

...................................

In addition to drinking more water when under stress, it is important not to assume that drinking other fluids like juices, coffee, tea, soda or alcohol are substitutes for clean water.

The fact is that all of those liquids will actually contribute to the condition of dehydration in the body.

http://www.waterbenefitshealth.com/depression-and-dehydration.html

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^^

makes sense, how awesome does it feel to have a big gulp of cool water when your hell thirsty.....

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