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jwerta

jwerta's heart break thread!

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thanks everyone.... i think i feel better but i know it will take time and i guess i just have to wait... i want to be friends with her and she wants the same so i think we can get that to work in the mean time i just have to wait and get over this :(

how about we make this the heart break thread???? everyone can share there heart break stories or if someone has just had their heat broken they can post in here cause wow it made me feel better hearing all your story's!

thanks everyone I love you all

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Airport ,airport ,airport!! Have yourself a holiday mate and forget all about it . Its too easy to sit around and feel sorry for yourself .

If you force yourself to have a good time ...especially somewhere exotic...and full of sexy ladies ..(somewhere like Pattaya Thailand! highly recommended lol ) ..Healing will happen ,possibly something magical. Distance yourself from the place that reminds you of her and pretty soon it will all seem quite trivial. And just be glad you didn't have kids mate . Plenty of fish in the sea.

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Meh, your a total catch jwerta...her loss.

I should remind people that this girl we are speaking of is a SAB member (not many know her,and jwerta might not want to elaborate on this). I am sure she is having a hard time knowing how much she has hurt jwerta.

Its just one of life's hurdles. Unfortunately , its one that carries the strongest pain.

Big hug jwerta.

Edited by Amazonian
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edit

Edited by gem
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Hey buddy! Sorry to hear about this. I suspect it could be an amazing lesson or life changing event that has disguised itself as a painful problem for the time being.

Short Story: Time will take care of all of this.

Notes from previous experience: Your own brain might be your worst enemy. During periods like this, I found it was my own thoughts, my own expectations, my own ideas about life that were causing me the most pain rather than anything a girl had said or done.

At times, I'd just be stuck in fear. Heart beating, stomach churning, chain smoking and unable to do anything but ponder over all the bad things that were happening or might be happening. It was insane. But it helped me develop a technique which is useful.

One exercise I found to be use was to sit and meditate and to let all the negative thoughts play out until their conclusions.

If the mind wanders into unpleasant territory e.g 'is she with someone else now?' instead of letting your heart beat faster and your stomach sink, just sit and ask 'And then what?' or 'And why exactly is this bad?'

By doing this you can rid yourself of pain that you don't actually need to feel. You realise it's the ego that's causing all the pain, that there is nothing 'bad' or 'wrong' about what is going on, it's just a process.

Anyway, I found this useful to explore the thoughts that were causing pain and think them through to their absolute worst possible conclusions but all the time asking 'and then what?' or 'and why is this bad?'. Even the worst thing I could conjure wasn't really that bad, despite the nagging voice in my head saying 'how could she?, this is horrible, awful, wahh'. Having explored those painful thoughts, they no longer sting or cut as much.

Anyway, it'll be a rough ride, but I don't know a single person who hasn't come out of a break up with a better life as a result (in some cases it did take a long, long time though!).

All the best.

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Hey jwert,

Sorry for ur loss & heartache mate. Maybe ur commitment to her freaked her out, last time I spoke with u things seemed to be getting pretty serious. You guys are still pretty young, the whole thing could have freaked her out a bit, maybe.

Or maybe it was her parents :devil: ... :uzi: .

Needless to say, she will be one of many who help to teach u the ways of love. If u can take away some learning from the whole process then the next time shouldn't have to include the same lessons & heartaches.

Don't let it harden u up mate, she will always be ur 1st true love, not ur last.

Namaste....

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Sending you heaps of good vibes

Big red

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we love u too Jwerta

cuddles for u

I aggree with blowng

U will not see now or possibly ever, but everything happens for a reason. That u can be sure of and knowing it was meant to happen, kinda makes it feel better.

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Above all else love thy self.

She doesn't want this relationship to continue - that's alright, everybody deserves that simple right.

I'm 100% sure her reasons for the breakup are not because of what you are or what you were meant to have done or may have not done.

It's not your decision it's her decision don't eat yourself out over this life building moment. Let it wash over you and expose the layers of maturity that are waiting to shine.

Formula e relating to time it takes to get over this period Vs the actual time you spent together is irrelevant. There are no hard and fast rules .......because you make the rules. You control your own destiny - not others, her choices are entirely her own - you must respect that and come to grips with your own feelings. This will hurt man, obviously......... but will not destroy you it will strengthen your resolve.

At your age you'll more than likely go through trials of this nature again and they will serve a purpose.

Without these burns how will you ever find your soul mate?

Until you've been in a great relationship, waxing and waning, tumbling downwards and sideways,unfurling your inner emotions like a proud (but secret flag of majestic quality) you cannot grow.

Now is the time to grow jwerts, the pain will flow and then you'll be ready to go.

That's what this is - don't over complicate it my friend but learn from it and move on.

All the best music in our lives has come from a musician's pain and joys, their inward expansions being translated in a meaningful way for others to immerse themselves with and relate to in times of their own despair.

Do not diminish yourself because of others wishes, they too have the right to journey on their own path. If that means severing that emotional, intimate bond with you - then so be it.

SMILE and BREATHE

:)

It's amazing what the cosmos throws at us and her timing is impeccable.

When you start loving life again - and it will be soon,trust me bro - you will all of a sudden start to notice other's glances towards you, winks and smiles you've never seen before, the flirtatious comments that make us all feel special will start to be all over the place. Your stride will change, your sense of smell will return and your inner muscle will flex once more.

Above all else love thy self.

All is not lost, your journey has just begun. Getting smashed on the rocks will make you taller next time round and will allow you to see clearly what you really want from life's riches.

Wandering through the forest you sometimes trip over a branch or a log or a sapling whilst admiring the wildlife and flowers. You just get up of the floor and keep on trundling down that beautiful, amazing pathway to the next secret garden.

It's no-ones fault - not the other person's or your own - things just have a habit of running their course, that's all.

love and light to you mate, it's unbelievable the way this community 'gives it up for others'.

love and hugs to you all - and a really long,tickle under the armpit for you Jwerts

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welp, coincidentally my girlfriend just broke up with me also.

been a long time coming though, we've been drifting apart for a while. i'm going to go and get drunk with some mates, come home and cry myself to sleep, and then move on.

i'm actually quite happy to have written my previous post to help you out so recently, because now i'm reading my own advice and it's helping me cope immensely.

time for a new season to begin~

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i feel much better today thanks to all your kind words of truth and wisdom...

there are so many things that remind me of her, my love Javiera but time will show that all is good and that i am now a much stronger and better person. I will always love her.. how could i not after all the times we have shared but i guess its time to let go. we will still be friends ( I hope ) if i can be a man and show my maturity. i just need some time for this sadness to lift and this pain in my heart to leave but i know it will ive felt pain like this before. Like when my granperants died or my best pet ever died or one of my friends died or even just when I leanrt how cruel and unkind the world is on us puny little humans, silly animals we are....

thank you all for your support and all your love and kindness and the vibes that you have all sent me intentiallaly or just subconsiusly thank you all. I couldnt be who i am today without such a great comunity that is SAB!!!!

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@ etherealdrifter.... (Also known as 'drifter' :wink: ). ... I have to say that is the best thing you have ever posted. Really well put.(post 35)

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i want to be friends with her and she wants the same so i think we can get that to work in the mean time i just have to wait and get over this :(

how about we make this the heart break thread???? everyone can share there heart break stories or if someone has just had their heat broken they can post in here cause wow it made me feel better hearing all your story's!

thanks everyone I love you all

It's natural to want to be 'friends' but the reality is you never will be in that way. She's moved on and you must do the same - for yourself and also to allow her to move on. Some people can remain friends with an ex but with deep relationships more often than not its 'all or nothing'. A common mistake guys make is to get sentimental and either want to get back with an ex or cling to the hope of 'friendship'. This girl will never forget you or the good times you had but ultimately you have to move forward.

One day you'll look back and realise this was a good thing that happened.

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That's some wisdom right there.

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If you do truly want to be friends with her, then I recommend a break for as long as you need. Make it clear that after the break she is just a friend, with no special affections granted (or you will both send and/or receive mixed messages, and either or both of you will get hurt) . In my experience feelings don't really go away - they're re-directed - with this in mind, wait until your feelings are redirected into something else (someone new, your career, your hobbies, self-development, your plants) - without this I can't see how a friendship will work (your feelings will search for something to latch onto, and if you keep seeing her - it's only natural they'll find their way back). As long as you think about these issues - then that's good (even if you come to the opposite conclusion). :)

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Move into a new share house, Hell did I just get lucky! What a shame now that I can only look but not touch. :(

We've all seen your epic facial hair Jwerta, go put it to good use!

Edited by Halcyon Daze
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Life was great nothing could get me down

But somehow it all just seemed to turn around

It was all good it was all fun

And then you shot me to the ground

I didn’t think it would end the way it did

I didn’t think it would hurt the way it did

Everything happens for a reason

Its just like the end of a season

So its okay its all right

I just think of al the good times we had

When we went to that hotel

That was the best time of my life

I hope you enjoyed my company

The same way I enjoyed yours

When we dreamt with that cactus

That was the best time of my life

I didn’t think it would end the way it did

I didn’t think it would hurt the way it did

Everything happens for a reason

Its just like the end of a season

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love hurts !! head up jwerta and scarecrow :)

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I have been friends with my ex for about 14 years ( high school lover) and it is hard . They say you only fight with the

people you love and we fight so often about petty shit its not funny. But the hardest part for me, is that we have been intimate

with each other. Especially when the hormones get up there and we do start sleeping with each other . I just get so confused

and it really affects my current relationship . As a part of me will always have a thing for her and being friends some times just

does not cut it . I feel so cunt struck at times and people just tell me to get over her . But sometimes it so hard to let go especially

since she knows me so well and we have shared so much of our lives together . But if you feel that strong for her let her know that

and be honest about your feelings . As this will help the friendship, dishonesty will just hinder it . I feel for you dude, just dont let

your feelings get the better of you and remember that we are all here for you .

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Jwerta, you needn't worry. You should know by now that 95% of girls swoon for a guy who can sing and play guitar!

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Love is such a powerful emotion and hard to control. You cant explain love, just like you cant explain heartbreak, you have to experience it.

The saying 'Its better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all' is a popular one,...but sometimes i dunno about that. Love and heartbreak... euphoria and dysphoria... very Yin and yang..... I suppose you cant have one without the other?.But Is it really worth it?, sometimes i wonder :)

Anyway.. here's a song i like.

Edited by Amazonian

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I would deal with it by focusing on getting your game on. ...hehe,...or going completely Zen or something. But nothing gets you over a woman better then having fun and making love to other woman.Find your balance,.... look for the woman you want....... so many different woman...... and all have their special side..... see if their special side connects with yours. Don't get stuck on a woman that you find half half or somewhat your style. Remember,... hang out with cool friends and go date some woman.... have fun doing it man!

Hehehe,... get wasted, but not too wasted.... just drink enough to get the edge off your nervousness when approaching as many girls as you can..................

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What he said ^ lol it doesn't sound peachy but once ur face first in the peaches you will agree with him also ;)

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ok so you want to make this a heartbreak thread,.... I had my number of heartbreaks,... hehehe,.... the worse one was when I fell in love and became all wuzzem with this totally sexual woman........ I shouldn't have let my guard down,... hahaha,.... stay an animal in my opinion............ my gf calls me a beast and a brute every now and thn,..... but I know she likes that.... hahahaha,... what was the name of that movie again.... use your "ANIMAL MAGNETISM" hahahha

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Nah stay true to yourself man, just get out there and get yourself some pussy ;)

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