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Yawning Man

Pooping Stones

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Now i can't decide which i'd rather see, pics ov Torsten's sparkly pink bowel or Naja doing a happy dance....

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Looking at the 'Bristol Stool Chart' from the link above ( https://en.wikipedia...stool_chart.svg ).....What is considered a healthy stool... Number 3 on that chart?

:)

 

POOP TALK POOP TALK. My job means that I am far too liberal with the poop talk, so I am sorry if this makes y'all uncomfortable.

3 - 5 is ideal, but everyone has a different standard of "normal". I know of someone who'll do a 7 three times a day, and he's done that for years.

Drink more water, move around more, and switch to wholemeal.

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Halycon, the whole bowel cleanse thing is a scam. Those lengthy slimy turds are actually a direct product of the cleanse you consume, ie they are made up of psyllium, bentonite and the gums used in the cleanse.

 

Ok well I believe they are probably a scam except I know nothing about it.

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just reading up on the salt water cleanse** thing, and it's recommended that sea salt only to be used as it's un-iodized. why is this?

also i think buckwheat is awesome as a source of insoluble fibre, plus it has a complete protein profile which i think psillium lacks.

edit:

**also if you were going to do this regularly what would be an ideal time between? every week OK?

also i hope you're doing OK YM, and haven't exploded....

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Sorry to write in so late but the herb tobacco works very well at evacuating the bowels. Coffee synergises this effect.

The first cigarette of day is often referred to by smokers as "lighting the arse fuse".

(For really stubborn solid impactions please to read www.legislation.qld.gov.au/LEGISLTN/.../D/DrugsMisuseA86.pdf

which is guaranteed to give anyone the shits - I mean how many times can you change the same law, yet keep calling it Drug Misuse Bill 1986! - If you had a 1986 model car, over the years replaced every part with some thing new - how can it still be an 1986 model. It's a perversion of history. The Queensland Government was as corrupt as Charles Ponzi when they wrote it!

I was there in '86 and had a ball! Strange back then pot was weak, and everything else was strong)

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pat uri you're a funny cunt and your avatar contains a spiral so i like you.

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Gums are just added for the show effect - nothing more impressive than a 1m long gummy turd dropping out of your bum to give you that feeling of success.

 

*Laughing !

:lol:.

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pat uri you're a funny cunt and your avatar contains a spiral so i like you.

 

That is so mighty nice of you 'chnt'! - the local district certainly agree you're half right anyway!

I feel all a flutter like the time I posted a comment about AlienSexFiend and Nick Fiend replied! Oh you are real, 'chnt"! And you talking to me! And you like me! OOhhhh!

Coming from you the greatest, most prolific "Torment" Artist of our time - that's quite a complement! Your Art is such an inspiration - a Reality to me - the absurd reductionism of the Taoist 'dick&balls' motif of yours. Neer since Egon Schiele have I seen the existential struggle of an instinct driven being, an 'organ', a "phallus" designed for a function, twisted, pinched into surreal tort, restricted to dysfunction, in the end. Pressured to self destruction in effort to exist, its essence, its "seed", its pods popping into the most abstract of stars - crucifixes of sacrificed Messiahs, Descended, Resurrected - but still nailed to their crosses, forgotten by their disciples. Now condemed to the fate of Sisyphus forever. It evokes the sense of Anthony Burgess's book "A Clockwork Orange" - making it, where Kubrick was flamboyant.

So minimally rendered in economic black/white electric media - yet so crude, naively constructed, tensily painstaking assembled we feel the artist's agony and frustration. We see the failures and restarts and sense the compulsion the primal of it all - consciously requestioning the motive "why?""why me?""why us?". But like a Flemish Master his work is unmistakable in detail. Like Dali cannot be reproduced. But this master betrays his touch in a media that cannot be touched! Perhaps that's what he's saying - look! don't touch! it doesn't work anyway.

Yet he makes it so available to his people - and art gives art - I see his motif all through Australia - walls, silos, bus shelters, hymn books, etc. as if ejaculated into our perceptions by its presentation.

I can not help but deeply feel so much the victim of this artist's imagination as dear 'chnt' has made himself over the months he worked to give us this masterpiece.

I can' t hold back the tears anymore - Artist 'chnt' I embrace you! Like know like - my brother!

Please send me an autographed copy to hang between my Klee and Miro.

Your adoring, and probably over selfmedicated, fan Pat Uri

That should have been pretty moving folks!

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By the way 'Yawning Man' - how is the old "Gary Glitter"? - You 'crop sprayin' or 'cable layin' yet? There's still the herb Ricinus communis to try.

For more direct action it is rumored we might find something in Psylo Dread's "toybox" - when the room gets tidied up of course.

(Peace! Love! and Safe Travel - Mrs.Dread and her 'charming' husband Psylo!)

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Ayahuasca will in many cases empty the bowel like a bolt of holy lightning. I guess that only helps If you're located somewhere where it is legal to imbibe though.

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stomach massage can be very beneficial sallyd but i have to point a couple of things out.

it is true that you have to follow the direction of the large intestine ie, from the right hip up to the ribs, then across the ribs from right to left, then from the left side of the ribs down to the left hip, the only problem is, if you start at the start (bottom right) you can further clog up the intestines if they are already clogged up further down the track...

to prevent this, you have to start at the end of the large intestine, still pushing in the correct direction (ie clockwise) you must work backwards to help remove any blockages before pushing any material further along the large intestines. does this make sense?

ie starting at the left hip, pushing downwards and working up the left hip to the left ribs while still pushing downwards, next starting at the left ribs and moving to the right ribs while pushing towards the left ribs, thirdly starting at the right ribs and working towards the right hip while pushing towards the right ribs. doing this 3-5 times will help alleviate any blockages, once this has been achieved you can now start at the start of the large intestine and then work towards the end while pushing in the same clockwise direction.

 

Thanks chnt I've been doing this and it definitely helped get things moving! Unfortunately I followed up with a huge night out, unavoidable as was a surprise birthday for a family member, with a banquet meal of so many different types of gluggy food I've gone straight back to the way it was! Still, I'll keep at it now with some hope.

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whitewind, try VSL#3 as a probiotic. This is what the best gastroenterologists recommend. It is expensive, but it has almost immediate effect. Antibiotic damage can be two fold. One is that it can just reduce your overall number of goodies, so you simply need to rebalance by adding lots of goodies and by adding foods that support the goodies [eg metamucil]. The other is that the antibiotic may actually eradicate one or more of the goodie species which can permanently alter your digestive response. Recent research has shown that losing one of these goodies can also have profound effects on psychological symptoms such as anxiety, depression, pain, parkinsons, etc. This is because the vagus nerve is closely connected to the gut and responds to many of the chemicals produced by the bacteria there, forming a direct connection to the brain. Some of the goodies produce chemicals that keep us calm, happy and relaced. Some of the baddies produce chemicals that trigger parkinsons,depression, etc. Some goodies can be reintroduced via foods, but sometimes they are lost forever. The Centre for Digestive Diseases in sydney does poo transplants to reintroduce the missing goodies for people who have severe effects from their imbalance. But before any of that they will make you take a course of VSL3 ;)

 

Torsten that's awesome advice I can't thank you enough! For some reason no-one has explained this stuff very clearly to me before. I don't think I'm bad enough for a poo transplant, but I haven't been right for a while so I'm definitely going to try the probiotics and see how that goes.

It's fascinating to think that bacteria in the gut can affect mood, it possibly explains why my friend went quite so aggressively insane after he got bowel cancer, it seemed like he became mentally ill at the same time as physically. It was as if a complete change of personality occurred showing uncontrolled aggression, and this may well explain why it was so pronounced.

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Torsten wrote:

"Halycon, the whole bowel cleanse thing is a scam. Those lengthy slimy turds are actually a direct product of the cleanse you consume, ie they are made up of psyllium, bentonite and the gums used in the cleanse. A bowel is perfectly clean after 48h of a mild cleanse. Just ask any gastroenterologist. To perform a colonoscopy the bowel needs to be a sparkly pink and this is achieved with 24h of no solid food followed by another 24h of no solid food while taking a mild laxative. That's all it takes and I have the pics to prove it! "

Hi anyone that's interested

I agree it's a scam but I disagree that the long strands are comprised of "psyllium, bentonite and the gums used in the cleanse".

When the bowel is "cleansed" with lots of water it is actually left very exposed because you have washed away a lot of the mucus that protects the lining of the bowel. As a result the now exposed and easily irritated mucus membrane produces a lot more mucos than it would usually to keep itself nice and covered. It produces a lot of mucus!

The excess mucus then basically becomes a turd. It get dehydrated by the large bowel making it nice and ropey/stringy and of course disgusting.

That's what I think anyway. It's embarrassing to say why I think it but I am pretty sure that it is in fact a well cooked mucus turd because they can appear without the use of anyway bowel cleansing agents except for water.

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Sonny:

It is mostly psyllium husks. Try stir a teaspoon into a glass, and leave it to sit for a couple of hours, and you'll soon see how much water those psyliium husks absorb. I think bentonite is mostly an adsorbent dessicant (that's a 'd', not a 'b' in there) and is probably is used to increase the strength of the psyllium (so that it doesn't break so easily and can be forced along quickly). I'm not quite sure which gums are being used (can't be bothered trawling to find it either), but I would guess guar or xantham. I would estimate they are used also for gelling properties but mostly because they are emulsifiers (i.e. they will keep any oils/fats in phase with the water), that way if there's any unmetabolized oils/lipids, they are forced to come for the ride as well.

When the bowel is "cleansed" with lots of water it is actually left very exposed because you have washed away a lot of the mucus that protects the lining of the bowel. As a result the now exposed and easily irritated mucus membrane produces a lot more mucos than it would usually to keep itself nice and covered. It produces a lot of mucus!

Secondly, I'm not exactly sure how the body produces mucus, but I don't think the tissues that can make it, can make as much of it to make a giant turd without constantly tapping some food sources, as their cellular storage capacity is limited.

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It's embarrassing to say why I think it but I am pretty sure that it is in fact a well cooked mucus turd because they can appear without the use of anyway bowel cleansing agents except for water.

 

Quote of the week Sonny Jim!

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raw fresh celery juice like half a litre of it, :( man never again... I skulled it right after I juiced a half celery bunch within a minute I had the most insane stomach cramps.. I laid down and thought man I need to get to the toilet now... the rest is to horrific to recall but I made there just

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When the bowel is "cleansed" with lots of water it is actually left very exposed because you have washed away a lot of the mucus that protects the lining of the bowel. As a result the now exposed and easily irritated mucus membrane produces a lot more mucos than it would usually to keep itself nice and covered. It produces a lot of mucus!

The excess mucus then basically becomes a turd. It get dehydrated by the large bowel making it nice and ropey/stringy and of course disgusting.

 

If that was true then a properly cleansed bowel would produce these things continualy and they would be a well know feature for any gastroenterologist. But they are not and hence your theory doesn't work. if you produce these things after a proper laxative cleanse and without any food input then there is something wrong with your system. I presume that your preparation was not done right. Cleansing with just water will not clean things within 24h. It can also be fatal due to electrolyte problems.

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yes your exactly right about there being something wrong with my digestive system. I have an inflammatory bowel disease that why I know all about what dried mucus looks like. I noticed them post enema which I am not supposed to do because of my inflammatory bowel disease but this was before I knew about it.

I had seen the photos on the net and I recognised what the stringy stuff was because I had seen it before.

My idea was that after a water based enema, especially after one of those bowel cleanses that last a few days, the bowel is left a bit raw and is forced to produce a lot of mucus to compensate. I thought this might happen even in a healthy bowel, not just mine and of course I could be wrong. But those stringy things that look a bit like intestinal lining look exactly like dried mucus that I passed a day after I gave my self that enema I shouldn't have.

If you can imaging. I was thinking that the bowel produces a lot of mucus all at the one time due to the irritation of the enema/cleanse. This fill the intestinal lumen and dries into the shape of bowel lining.

I was thinking that maybe a cleanse that was excessive would produce the same amount of irritation and thus mucus production in a healthy gut as mine did from a small volume warm water enema.

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Yeah and I can't account for why these things don't show up in colonoscopy. The only way that would work is if they only happen in the excessive cleanses and the laxatives used pre colonoscopy aren't employed for long enough in most people to cause the gut to have to produce enough mucus to form one of these things.

I am not defending this to the death or anything I am just pretty sure from my own experience that they are mucus. It could be a mix of both or something that only occur in inflammatory diseases of the bowel.

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can you outline the cleanse before we go any further with this. also what was the enema composed of?

what you are describing is just not how the gut works. mucus is virtually colourless so it can't produce those brown gummy cleansing turds without there being something else present. also mucus does not have the cohesive strength to produce those things. Furthermore, mucus is itself irritating to the colon, so it is not going to get 'dried' in the colon because the colon's immediate response to irritation is to produce more mucus and facilitate ejection [any who has had an extremely snotty flu can attest to this].

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warm water enema of small volume, maybe only a 500ml. edit: sorry it was probably more like 1 litre plus.

maybe it's just because of the inflammatory bowel disease :(

it did it twice and got good results but also got those things.

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dried mucus might be taking on a bit of bile pigment etc? blood?

I don't think it's quite right to say that this is not how the body works. I know that my bowel produces a lot of mucus when the inflammatory disease gets bad because it's inflamed, excessive mucus production is a sign of an irritated bowel that may of course have have ulcers or worse.

edit: dried mucus does have the cohesive strength to produce ropey strings. It can get quite hard and thick it seems. Ropey tenacious mucus.

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so from the above it seems you did not actually do a cleanse, but just an enema?

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I've done a few cleanses with magnesium oxide and there were no signs of mucus when I did them. That shit is like a radiator flush for your intestines it gets rid of everything if there are no blockages to or deformities in the intestines to impede its action.

The first time I used it nothing happened for 4 days, I was so blocked up it couldn't do it's job.

The next time I did when I had better bowel function it took less than 24 hours, when my bowels are working better it took less than 10 hours.

You don't want to risk a fart when you've had that shit.

I firmly believe lifestyle factors play a large role in intestinal function. Factors that a western doctor ( a GP anyway) wouldn't even consider most times, I've found they just want to treat the symptoms until the problem is chronic and then when you get to see a specialist you might encounter a more thorough diagnostic investigation where the appropriate questions are asked.

In both Chinese & Ayuvedic medicine the practitioners ask about lifestyle and things like sleep habits are very important from their perspective. Both those philosophies consider it unnatural for people to be awake at night and believe that being awake from between 11pm to 6am (7am at the latest) has an adverse effect on digestion. They also believe that movement is of utmost importance to correct bowel function. There are even yogic asanas that focus on digestion and bowel function. These days we stay up late and sit in front of a computer for long periods so in many ways we dig our own graves with our modern lifestyles.

Emotion plays a large role too, anger has a classic association with constipation and holding on to anger has the effect of impeding the function of the vagus nerve which causes constipation. When there is constant tension in the abdomen and the diaphragm doesn't move properly the vagus nerve doesn't get the stimulation it needs. There is a definite mind/body connection here.

It's intriguing to see people that are angry as part of their profession, every time I see an angry cop I take solice in the fact he is making himself constipated through his own emotional extremes. They are killing themselves with their own (often misplaced or unneeded) anger.

Breathe man - relax

You couldn't pay me enough to do a job that caused me that sort of anger & tension.

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so from the above it seems you did not actually do a cleanse, but just an enema?

 

yes, sorry Torsten I tried to make that clear a few times. I wasn't making a big distinction between the two but I should have.

I have done a two week bowel cleanse with herbs and very restrictive diet but no enema and never gotten those things, it was only the pure warn tap water that caused it.

It makes me think that maybe the people who produce those things are actually not in such good shape because they look exactly like "those things" :(

When the naturopath who taught my class about the various intestinal cleanses talked about doing it to him self. He said he had produces them after a three (or so) day fast plus daily enema. He said he passes "those things" and was left feeling a bit "raw" inside.

When it happened to me I put two and two together and assumed that the three day fast and regular enema had really thrashed his guts and left them inflamed and irritated thus producing a mucus turd.

By the way, I am not advocating any kind of bowel cleanse. I think they can often be excessive. I like the probiotic etc ideas that Torsten has posted for good gut health over the long haul.

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